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Find out what a woman wants, and then don’t give it to her
Thu, 11 Nov 1999 17:45:51 -0500
Daniel: My own stories include a bank trustee in Chicago who had me all
thinking she was the only decent woman in the world.
My Comment: Where do they get these ideas??!! I have had the same
thing. I think that many women may use this to try and get you over the
thought that being with them in a monogamous relationship means you are
supposed to not have any other women. If you start to believe she's
better than all the rest (or so the thinking seems to be) then you
aren't missing anything.
Horn Dog: About the pheromone guy: Rather than assault everyone with bad
hygiene, it would be better to soak a piece of cloth with your sweat
during a
workout, a couple of times at least. Then when you need it, rub it
vigorously on the warm spots in your body such as the wrists, neck, and
chest. The effect should be consciously unnoticeable, and trust their
unconscious to pick it up. Possibly what you could do with the
"no-bath/mask it with cologne" trick is go for maybe one day without a
bath, rather than the two or three you suggested. Also, if you need to
bathe just before you go out but don't want to ruin the effect, use a
product that is a deodorant ONLY, rather than an
antiperspirant/deodorant combo. I have found that my sweat mixes with
the cologne in the "Deodorant only" product with a nice effect. BTW,
Roman gladiators used to swab off their sweat, collect it in jars, and
sell it.
Eric: I have had women tell me (with no connection between us, and this
was way
before I ever discovered SS) when I noticed that I smelled "bad" after
dancing or what have you and wanted to take a shower to "freshen up",
"you don't smell so bad that you need a bath"-type of statements. These
women have had no problems telling me the "truth" no matter what the
subject but it's definitely been happening since I was 18 or more. I
think I might have used it to determine if SHE could smell my
"stench"..but I think I could have utilized it much better if I had the
concept of pheromones in mind. As a matter of fact, I have recently
started working on a theme of pheromones and human body odor to reframe
any resistance in that area. This does not mean that hygiene goes
completely out the window, I still do everything else to make myself
attractive but a smell/pheromone hiding bath/cologne spray is not an
essential part of the everyday routine. The actual smell humans give
off is close to musk, btw, and that's why so many colognes have musk in
them because it simulates some of the low level pheromones. Speaking of
colognes, Aleister Crowley had a "love potion" that he used to rub
behind his ears and on his scalp, it was made of ambergris, musk, and
civet essences blended in equal portions. Of course, ambergris is ultra
expensive and genuine musk oil is almost as rare but if you have the
desire to know how someone like Crowley got laid..try it out..:)
My Comment: This discussion stinks.
Craig: Mystery's Pez Opener is the best I've used in a while. You walk
up to a girl, tilt your head to the side and look serious, stare for a
second, and wait for her to give you the "What do you want" look. Crack
a half smile, and pull out the Pez.
Me: "Pez?"
(This is fuckin' unreal...you can use it anywhere and it always gets a
laugh. And who doesn't love Pez?)
Her: "hehehe...I love Pez!"
Me: "Didn't your mom warn you about taking candy from strangers?"
Her: "Yeah...."
Me: "And it's bad for your teeth."
Her: "Yeah, but I like it!"
Me: "Isn't it funny how what's dangerous can be so exciting? Tell ya
what...Suck me cock and I'll let ya sit on my face!"
You get the point. It's a classic opener.
Phillip: I just read the following article in New Scientist....it's a
great little bit of "scientific research" which can easily be turned
into a fun SS pattern. First, the complete short article (4 paragraphs):
GOOD TO BE BI (New Scientist, page 29, 23 October 1999)
Female weevils pretend to be heterosexual couples by mounting each other
in
order to attract large males. Male Diaprepes abbreviatus weevils aren't
very good at distinguishing females from males, so they often approach
copulating couples, because one of the amorous pair will be a female.
But Ally Harari and Jane Brockman of the University of Florida in
Gainesville found that only larger males
approach copulating couples, because they are more likely to win the
female
away from her existing partner (Nature, vol. 401, p762).
So by pretending to be a copulating pair, female weevils attract better
quality mates. "They do it in order to attract the larger males - the
smaller ones can't compete," says Harari.
------
There are good ways of re-writing this report into a Speed Seduction»
pattern which would be useful in a variety of situations - the obvious
example being where you approach two girls (who may or may not be bi).
The primary elements of a pattern built around this story are:
(1) If one (or both of) these girls show some sort of "bisexual"
behaviour in front of you then they will attract your attention.
(2) That by turning your attention to them (approaching), it is
self-evident that you are indeed a "larger" male (point down to your
penis) - just the sort they want to attract to the party!
Eric: First of all, the book on closing sales (the name of the author
had escaped me, but it's Stephan Schiffman) in the light of seduction..
it's not THAT good. I'll be reading his book on cold call techniques in
the next day or so. I think it can be applied to cold walkups.
Next, on "The History Channel" last week there was a series on the
history of sex. One of the segments was about how the Romans used to put
oil on the skin of gladiators after they worked out and then "scraped"
(for lack of a better word) it off them and into bowls to be used as
aphrodisiacs by other men. THC reported that it was due to the high
amount of pheromones in the sweat of the gladiators. Interesting to say
the least. I'm looking to get the whole series from them to see what
else they had to say (I was busy getting busy so I missed a lot of it:).
Freeqshow (Commenting on hypnotic seduction tapes that you play in the
background when someone is over at your house): The standard tapes those
guys sell for $17 do not fucking work. Their custom jobs start at $89
but I always use the Sledgehammers....the difference is six voices vs.
one...very effective.
Anyway, been having a lot of fun with romance novels. Yep...the
cheapest, cheesiest shit I have ever read but it's good inspiration
material. I've been re-writing a lot of shit with Chris and myself as
characters and feeding her this stuff and she fucking loves it!
Greg: We sure are getting into a lot of morals and ethics. I think I've
finally decided I don't have any, or any bad ones at least. If you're
having problems with your own morals, the one thing that I've done that
may help is to reframe them. First of all, we know the babes really
want the bad boys, who use 'em and lose 'em, then they feel guilty, feel
used. Those are a dime a dozen, and when you put yourself up against
that kind of person, asking yourself "Who would be better, me or another
player?" what is the answer? See, when I ask myself that question, the
answer always points to me and gets me in the mindset of seizing the
day, before they get fucked over yet again. Women have actually talked
about being lied to and hurt, and the next minute thanked me for a
wonderful night. Even when it's a one nighter! Now that tells me there
must be a big difference between most guys that smooth talk the HBs out
of their pants and the Speed Seducer who knows how to make them feel
wonderful before and after. So the next time you're contemplating your
morals, you may find yourself questioning whether they are really true
or not. I think many experiences show you that some are simply false,
or should I say UNATTRACTIVE!
Oh fair maiden, I will show you the way, and save you from another bad
lay. :)
John: Two comments:
1. Can you bring in an objective criticism of the various seduction
methods? With so many variations of 'the one true seduction method' us
guys need a 'consumer report' to choose the right one. For example,
while I remain loyal to SS, I'd like to get an additional system to help
eliminate any 'google' that always seems to appear. But what system
works best?
My Comment: If you are looking for help with your google (which you use
incorrectly above; it really is a word that sort of replaces
"confidence"), I think affirmations done correctly and persistently will
have a big effect. Also, the more you do walkups, the more you will get
comfortable with it and your self image will improve as you have more
success. I think you should find what works best for you; there is no
one system that is foolproof. But there are a lot of neat things to
learn and try.
John: 2. I'm looking for a video/great book on cunnilingus. Know
where I can get any?
My Comment: I know I saw some on Amazon.com. There are several books on
it. I would get on there and do some searches (e.g.. oral sex, sex,
pleasure, etc.) and see what you come up with.
Zvi (Commenting on: Peta (Commenting on my comment "SS is taught, as
Major Mark says, "ethics free" which I interpret to mean "here are the
techniques, what you do with them is up to you." In other words, just
because someone knows how to seduce a woman doesn't reflect on what he
will do with this information; it's his values, morals and qualities
which will determine that. Of course, some us get lost in the
process..."): This is exactly it. As an NLP Trainer, I am always asked
about its ethics... as if IT is something that lives and breathes and =
has power...of course it doesn't.... it's a tool... an attitude... that
you can take on or not and it's a tool and an attitude that you can use
for good or well perhaps not so good... but in the end, the people who
use it with bad feelings in mind, with a sense of getting revenge on
women, will end up alone, because if you have these kinds of thoughts in
your head, you won't be a nice person to be around.. You need to
overcome some of that and begin to see people as all having some good
potential, and be able to sort the toxic from the non toxic women..."):
I must share my feelings here. SS is NOT ethics free, just as not all
attitudes are ethics-free (the attitude that "I'll blow up anyone that
stands in my way" is NOT ethics-free! c'mon!). If a tool by design
violates your ethical guidelines -- don't use it! My ethical guideline
is simple: if I were in her shoes, would I want a man to use SS with me
or not? The answer is simply: YES!! or else I'm not SSing her properly.
My Comment: I forget which seminar I was at (I may have said this
already) but the woman who was sitting in said that if she was seeing a
guy who didn't know this stuff, she'd want him to take a seminar. I
agree -- it should be used to let her experience the pleasure that she
really wants to have.
Zvi: In one exception I disagree with Ross (and I think he anyway
modified things
recently) -- the Boyfriend Destroyer. Unless I am willing to give her
MORE
than her borefriend (and that includes the level of his commitment), it
is WRONG to "destroy" him. If I were in her shoes, I would NOT want
someone to "destroy" my borefriend unless you'd be willing to give me
more than the BF. And, really, there are so many fish in the pond that
there's no NEED to destroy the poor fella. Either move on to someone
better, OR have her FORGET HIM for the time that you want and install in
her the feelings that our (short-term) relationship does not harm her
primary relationship. With power come responsibilities.
My Comment: Boyfriends are often barely there; the relationship is
weak, she really wants to get rid of him, she is just saying that to see
if you want her enough to push through her objections, etc. I use them
(usually not successfully) but if I sense that there's a real closeness
there I just tell her that he's a very lucky guy and move on.
Zvi (Commenting on my comment "SS gives you the tools. What you do with
them, is up to you."): I understand that, however, some tools BY DESIGN
are wrong. Ex., anchoring the NEGATIVE to the poor borefriend. I agree
when you sense that she's saying this just to fulfil her obligation and
then move on with you, since her "no" is just a facade, but in many
cases I don't think I have the right
to judge and moreover many times I really CAN'T judge what is the
situation
between them. The key again is to think: If she'd know that I anchored
negativity to her BF, would she agree to that? In many cases I think
the answer is NO and in those cases it is WRONG. Unlike the rest of SS
that the woman actually ENJOYS AND APPRECIATES your SSing her, even when
you tell her afterwards!!
My Comment: The reality of women is that you cannot listen to what they
say (with exceptions, of course), you have to pay attention to what they
do. And you never know what is going to happen from one minute to the
next (how about that woman who left her newly married husband to be with
Jerry Seinfeld? Since they are getting married, clearly this turned
into something very serious and should be looked at from that
perspective. But if he didn't have some method -- here it was fame and
money -- to get to her, he might still be pining over Shoshanna). I
think if a woman is really into a guy, these techniques will not work
(in fact, Ross and Major Mark have often commented that there's nothing
you can do in those circumstances). And that has been my experience as
well.
Horndog: Speaking of 10's: In addition the usual boyfriend destroyer,
neg hits, and killer confidence tapes, has anyone evolved a process for
dealing with super model types that is specifically tailored to their
mindset? You know, on the odd occasion
when you actually WANT Yasmine Bleeth for a night, in spite of her lack
of tenants in the well lighted house of hers?
My Comment: The best I have seen is Rick's version of stealing the
woman's frame. Here he turns the tables on them by doing to them what
they do to guys. It is based on the concept of finding out what a woman
wants, and then don't give it to her. Anyone (including you, Rick) who
would like to elaborate on this, please do.
Horndog: COMMENTS ON ROSS:
[However, I WILL say many exceptionally pretty women are really LOSERS,
with good genes and NOTHING else to their credit.]
I agree with you there. My own personal experience has borne that out.
Not to mention the fact that a number of them, because they are so self
absorbed, were just plain LOUSY F****S when the lights went out.
[Please, PLEASE give me an 8 with a great attitude, in touch with her
sexuality and comfortable with it, willing to learn NEW things WITH her
own mind over Carmen or other "Baywatch babes" ANY DAY OF THE WEEK.]
DITTO, DITTO. Perfect 10's and long term satisfaction rarely mix. And
here's a secret: I've slept with some in the 7-9 range who were single
mothers...something about having had a kid just totally liberates their =
sexual appetite. They have a new found sense of the depth of their
womanhood, and THEY end up wearing ME out. A couple of them I wondered
if maybe they hadn't been a porn star before their button-down office
jobs.
[They are almost ALL of them drug addicted, strippers, etc.etc...HUGE
losers with NOTHING going for them but their looks....I mean
N-O-T-H-I-N-G. How is someone like this even worthy of being something
other than a VERY exciting opportunity for me to jerk off inside of? WHY =
BOTHER?]
TRUE, TRUE, but on the plus side, they're fun to show off to your
friends, and after you've slept with them you can think, "Yeah, I did
YOU, baby, and don't you forget it!" Say what you will about notches in
the bed post, truth be told once in awhile it can be pretty cool.
Linda: In response to Ross' response: I am very happy with the way my
husband is now. I think it probably wouldn't change him much if he
became a SSer but I don't know so that's why I was asking those of you
who are married to them! So what do the wives say?
My Comment: Play with fire and you might get burnt!
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