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David DeAngelo’s Double Your Dating Mailbag

“Q&A: Dating Tips Monday Mailbag” – September 10, 2001

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“Q&A: Dating Tips Monday Mailbag” – September 10, 2001


“…The run your fingers through the tips of their hair right before you kissed them thing really worked, it was kind of an awkward situation, it was a school dance, and she said that her ears hurt from the music so we went for a little walk. we found a place to sit down that was away from the dance so the noise wouldn’t over bear the conversation, we got to a point in the talk that was kinda awkward, we were talking about how they always make kissing so long and dramatic in the movies, after that, it was that funny silence you get every once in a while, but i tried the run your fingers through her hair, and did that for about 30 seconds, i wasn’t even trying to kiss her at this point, but the next thing i knew she was leaning over to me for a full fledged kiss, i also noticed, if you keep running your fingers through her hair while kissing, the kiss lasts longer, i tried this out, the first kiss, i stopped running my fingers through her hair, and the second one lasted about 2 times as long because i kept running my fingers…. thanks for you help.


P.S. you are a genius.”

MY RESPONSE: Hey, great job! And thanks for the idea to keep running your fingers through her hair as you kiss her. This is good stuff. Has anyone else out there used “The Kiss Test” successfully? Have you found anything that works with it like this? Let me know.


“How do I start a conversation on the street or in a restaurant with a good looking woman?”

MY RESPONSE: First of all, it really depends on the situation. Most times, I’ve found that if a woman is walking down the street, or sitting in a restaurant, she’s usually BUSY doing something. Either she’s going somewhere, she’s with friends, or she’s otherwise involved.

With this in mind, I like to try to get her email/phone number quickly so I can follow up later. Just use the “3 Minute Phone Number” technique that you learned in your first newsletter (also described in detail in my book “Double Your Dating“).

Most guys don’t think of the fact that you can get her email/phone number and ALSO go somewhere with her right there on the spot if she’s not busy.

I recommend saying something like “You know, there’s a great coffees shop around the corner, would you like to join me for a cup of something delicious and some stimulating conversation?”

The key is to realize that it is very possible, and in fact pretty easy to get a woman’s email/phone number in a couple of minutes if you know how. And since women on the street or in restaurants are usually busy doing something, this allows you to follow up and talk to them later when you can have their full attention.


“My name is T. This is a simple question that you probably hear alot. I have this girl I know and she likes this guy, but when I talk to her I only can get the usual responses like “yeah” “no”. I really think she is attractive, but can’t get her attention into coming up to me and talking. I always have to come up to her and talk. I am not a really good flirter either. So do you know how I can get her to open up and start coming to me and talking?”

MY RESPONSE: First of all, start treating her like she’s your BRATTY LITTLE SISTER. And do yourself a HUGE favor and go read some books about comedy.

You have to learn how to tease women, give them a hard time, and make them laugh at it all. The attitude is called “Cocky and Funny” and I describe it in great detail in my book. I learned this from a good friend who is one of the best I’ve ever seen with women.

At first, I didn’t understand how acting “cocky” could EVER be attractive to women, but after watching him in action on many occasions, it all started to come together for me.

The cockyness MUST be combined with humor. This creates a situation where the woman is laughing, and at the same time thinking “Who does this guy think he is?” It creates tension and MOST IMPORTANTLY, a magnetic ATTRACTION.

So go read some books about comedy, and start treating her like your Bratty Little Sister. Have fun, and make sure she’s laughing… it’s magic.


“I am corresponding with this girl I knew back in high school and we have been doing or going on a few dates out to dinner and such. I havent been to movies or anything with her but I really like her. I am off to college but I really would like to date her. It seems to me like she likes me otherwise she wouldn’t have went out to dinner with me? Do you think I should have to ask her to see if she is interested in dating or will it happen if I keep in touch with her and do things with her when I am home from college?

I also would like to know when the time is right (if there is any) when I can hold her hand? Thanks…”

MY ANSWER: First of all, you need to try The Kiss Test with her! Next time you’re out with her, find a time to sit right next to her, and while you’re talking, reach over and start stroking the tips of her hair.

Then say “Your hair looks really soft.” Do it for a moment and then stop. Watch closely. If she likes it, and she’s smiling, etc. then reach back over and keep doing it! If she likes this, then move closer to her and give her a little kiss.

Also, try the idea from above of continuing to stroke her hair as you kiss her. If you and she start kissing, you’ll have a much better idea about how she feels about “dating”.


Well, that wraps it up for this week.

If you have a success story or a good question for me, send it to:

[newsletter sign-up link]

And I just might use it in my next Monday Mailbag!

Talk to you soon,

David D.

P.S. If you haven’t downloaded a copy of my eBook “Double Your Dating“… what are you waiting for? Just go to:

[ebook download link]

…and read all the details! You’ll get dozens and dozens of great tips and ideas on how to meet and date the kinds of women you’ve always wanted.

This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit

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