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“Q&A: Great Examples Of Cocky And Funny” – December 6, 2001

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“Q&A: Great Examples Of Cocky And Funny” – December 6, 2001


“I must say that I am having the time of my life using your fine techniques David. I have never gotten a response like this from girls before. It’s like you said when one creates that edge of your seat tension; it’s like magic cause you know they’re going crazy inside. But here comes my question: is it normal for me to feel tension too? You see, when I leave them with that hard to get vibe, I feel tempted to see more of them (as do they), but I don’t want to drop the ball. So is there anything I could do to not feel that tension?”

>MY COMMENTS: This is a really interesting question to me. My question for you is this: Do you enjoy it or not? I personally enjoy the “not knowing” that goes along with a brand new encounter (or series of encounters). I think that it kind of adds to the spice of life. I mean, how fun would life be if you knew how everything was going to turn out? To answer your question directly, the thing you can do to not feel the tension is to MAKE IT NOT MATTER. Think about ways to think of a woman that cause her to not matter, and you won’t feel a preference for the outcome to go one way or another… and you won’t feel any tension associated with not knowing. But is that any fun? Now I’m starting to sound like an amateur philosopher. But aren’t we all amateur philosophers on some level? (lol… couldn’t resist that one!)


“I read your e-book and I totally agree on the thing about drama and how women love it. My question is how should I act when a girl is performing these drama scenes? Should I tease her? How do I avoid hurting their feelings and getting rejected? Love your stuff… keep up the good work. Could you recommend some exercises on how to develop the “Cocky and Funny” attitude?



>MY COMMENTS: OK, here’s the deal… I always like to put women getting upset in my presence into this perspective: “Awww, isn’t she cute getting all upset like that?” If this only causes her to escalate, then I’ll say something like “Wow, you’ve really got this getting upset thing down. Does it usually work to get other people to get upset with you and do what you want them to do? Because I’m just not into that much drama in my life…”

The idea is to communicate clearly that you are not in the least bit interested in taking part in the drama with her. The idea of saying something like “You know, you’re kind of cute when you’re mad” or laughing in a charmed way works like MAGIC to diffuse a dramatic situation while at the same time keeping you in control of it.

As far as developing the attitude, do yourself a favor, and take out a piece of paper and a pen, and write down ten common situations, then how you could act cocky and funny. For instance, let’s say we’re talking about being at a bar… One common situation that happens at bars is bumping into people (I mean physically bumping into them, as bars are often crowded). What could you say that is cocky and funny when you bump into a girl?

“Excuse me, did you just grab my ass?”


“Oh, Damn.”

That’s pretty funny. And cocky.

“Hey, easy there tiger… this isn’t football.”

Or… “Calm down, there’s enough beer here for everyone… you don’t have to go knocking people down for it.”

Get the picture?


“A friend of mine and I were in that Bar the other night, and when two girls walked in, I simply looked at them, and kept on our conversation, and then looked at them again as if I knew them forever. And when one of the two took her coat and looked around as to where she could leave it, I said to her: (They were close by, standing, us on stools) “Well I don’t believe you are going to ask us to hang your coat on our stool!”, she took that shocked expression, and then I added, “Well I suppose I could have it, but only for about 5 minutes…” She looked at her watch as to determine what time she should take it back, and I made a joke about her watch: I didn’t know Rolex also made plastic watches! That was it. We started talking. And later on, I said: “Sure you don’t think I am going to offer you my seat and buy you all the drinks you’re having tonight, Right? Half an hour later she was all over me…

And then we left (having been asked for my phone number). It was like she was programmed to be attracted to me!

Question: In the success story, I mentioned two girls, and my friend. This immediately divides us in couples. Well I ended up with the less attractive, but more outgoing one. We’ll meet again soon. How can I “dump” the one I am talking to, swapping couples?…

Much love, S – Your faithful student.”

>MY COMMENTS: First of all, if you’re looking for a great example of cocky/funny, read this one a few times to get the feel! This is great stuff.

“Well I don’t believe you are going to ask us to hang your coat on our stool!” … “Well I suppose I could have it, but only for about 5 minutes…”

“I didn’t know Rolex also made plastic watches!”

Classic material. Notice something: This line of “Don’t think you’re going to take my stool” could be used in all kinds of situations, WHETHER OR NOT A WOMAN IS EVEN INTERESTED IN YOUR STOOL. Just the fact that she’s taking off her coat, looking around, etc. is reason enough to trigger a conversation-starter like this. And yes, it IS almost like the woman is programmed to be attracted to you…

To answer your “swapping couples” question… so you want to know how to steal the cute one from your buddy who thinks he’s got the hottie? lol… I’m no expert in cock-blocking friends, so I’m going to leave it to you to figure this one out! lol…


…I’ve included this email because it’s such a great re-interpretation of my materials, and it’s also a great read. Enjoy…

“Just gotta say that your newsletters just seem to get better and better, Dave.

Your “Off The Cuff” style and wit is very real. Very together. And I haven’t been able to find any “out in left field” philosophies in the year I’ve been reading your stuff. You kept your ebooks simple, light, and give ample directives toward furthered study, application, and growth.

Books, Movies, Exercises… These should be part of a larger package which you will make even more money on in the future. You could run seminars, and study courses, and training networks. Ya know Dave, you have a unique market with a profoundly deliverable approach, which is in fact developing as you continue these newsletters. The Q&A’s are especially potent.

Now for my situation. I’m a single father with total custody of a ten year old son. I work all day. Have not yet found child care enough to be able to go out enough to fathom taking advantage of the dating scene. Not enough to make it work, anyways… I get out about once or twice a month; if that much.

But OK, OK,,, You may tell me to take this opportunity to complete all your study directives during these next two womanless years of my life.

Ok. Enough said. I like the theorem you have established regarding what women are attracted to and how jerks tend to radiate such unbefitting magnetic wonders without even trying. Now I understand. Now it makes sense. It’s simply an ironic side effect caused from a destructive core attitude. The stress factor imposed in a kiddish way, pressure on, tease and keep the ball in your own court, cause it’s your ball kinda’ play works. You outlines it. You developed amazing efficiences. It works for you and it will work for me.

But as for the brutes, a**holes and jerks, it’s not a method, per se’. It’s aside effect. The jerks know the games women play and they don’t let them get away with it because they would take every advantage of anyone they can, anyways. The jerks have the style, the jest, the child-like sibling revelry mindset which when kept somewhat controlled within social gatherings it tends to perk women up. Many women find this somewhat attractive. Not primarily because it’s attractive at all, but because most gentlemen don’t know what it is about jerks that makes them so attractive. They wouldn’t dare bust a babe in public, nor wittingly evade they’re wiley feminine, blatantly common, yet stealthfully assertive, pertinent personal-tech type info-gathering questions. A gentleman wouldn’t answer with revealing tactful secrets only women are suppose to know. Nice guys generally will not rock the boat. They’re polite, gracious, knowable, and generous. But that is not what attracts them to your bedside. Sad but true.

The jerks have no sympathy for women’s weaknesses. Their confident aggressive posture falls as second nature due to their overblown egos and lack of moral conscience. The gentleman’s social approach on the other hand is friendly, agreeable, compromising, and casual, if at all interesting. The jerk however takes every opportunity to skillfully and shamelessly air her dirty laundry within unbefitting jests and jokes, and candidly mocks her with light hearted irony. Then he does something nice once in a while. However the jerk always uses it against her, and those women learn to deal with it. Regardless…. This process keeps her on her toes, feeling a little embarrassed most of the time, and always pinned, helpless, or challenged.

The jerk constantly brings her feelings to the surface, good or bad. He keeps her feeling something, all the time. The gentleman wants to fascinate her, comfort her and make her happy in simple ways. Too bad most women will gravitate toward who ever makes them feel a variety of intense feelings, regardless of how ironic or illogical it is for her. And it is human nature to follow your feelings. Now it’s time to learn something new.

You have taught that as one learns the skills and techniques of bringing out the same feelings in conversation with woman then those women will seek you out for more than just conversation. Interestingly enough, the jerks do a shoddy job at it, causing ill effects as well. With a little practice a well versed, fun loving daringly confident gentleman can find more women gravitating towards him in a relatively short time, than the jerks will ever have.

Although there is a lot more to it, of course, that is it, in a nut shell. We need only realize the new equation, (thank you David!) then begin a new quest toward learning as much as possible about it. Yes, your directives include reading various books, renting specific videos, buying some new clothes, beginning a health club workout schedule, investigating some new social outlets, and enrolling in a class of some kind which may be predominantly of attractive women. And of course read the materials again and again till I know them well.

Then take chances. Practice, practice, PRACTICE. Keep the conversations short and get those addresses and digits. My only draw back now is where do I find the time???. Have you known anyone who was able to use this kind of drawback to their advantage, Dave? That is of course that I have to be both mother and father, all the time, without evening breaks because ya can’t leave a 10 year old home alone, at night.

With kind regard ………….. ===M.===

>MY COMMENTS: I’m speechless. That was awesome.

OK, I’m over my speechlessness, so let’s address your comments…

It is so refreshing to get an email like this. You obviously “get” what I’m talking about, even though you haven’t had the time to get out and use what you’ve learned. And I appreciate the way that you have intelligently (intellectually?) broken down the main ideas and explained them from your perspective. I’m probably going to use your letter in a future book or training. Really.

As far as your situation goes… I have a new friend that I’ve made who is in a similar situation. Except that he has more than one child. He has taken the concepts and applied them to meeting women online. As I mention in my book, AOL is an AMAZING place to meet new women… and there are dozens of “online dating»” sites available if you prefer the personals route. Get AOL, then learn get out there and start meeting women, chatting with them, and using the concepts to connect with them and attract them. The wonderful benefits include not having to go out and spend money, being able to do it whenever you have time (especially at night after the little one is asleep), and being able to THINK about your comments (as chatting is about 1/10 the speed of normal conversation. Try it, you’ll like it.

***OK, well there you have it. If you haven’t come to my site to download your copy of my eBook, Double Your Dating, then you need to go to:

[ebook download link]

…now and do it. It’s the best investment you can make in your future relationships with women, period.

I’ll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. I love Success Stories… so send them to me at:

[newsletter sign-up link]

…and put the words “Success Story” in the subject line of the email!

This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit

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