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“Can You Tease A Woman Too Much?” – December 12, 2001

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“Can You Tease A Woman Too Much?” – December 12, 2001

This week I’m going to try a new format: One question, and one answer. The difference between this and past newsletters is that I’m going to go into detail with my answer, and hopefully give you one great, solid idea to work with. Here goes…

This Week’s Question:


I recently just bought your e book. I am an entrepreneur and took the day off to study your book(s). I was laughing in amazement through the entire book. Before I had bought your book, i had taken my sister out to dinner to interview her about some of your ideas (from the newsletter) and to also get insight into women “players”. I used her ideas and yours to approach and get, two numbers from two attractive women. Thank you! On to my question, I had set up a date with my younger sisters friend that we hadn’t talked to in 10+ years. After contacting her, she was very flirtatious and sent some semi-sexy pics on line. She lived in [another state]. So when I flew in for business, I had set up a night for us to go out. So when we met, I was kind of weird (the last time i had seen her was when she was 11 yrs old). I started teasing her and she looked at me like “What the hell did you just say?”. So I kept on teasing and kept getting those looks (like she was confused and shocked and did NOT like it). She didn’t respond to the teasing very well, like I had anticipated. So it was an weird situation. I wanted to know is there any kind of a “back up” plan if the teasing doesn’t work? Also does this work in certain parts of the country and not others? This girl was from the east coast and east coast girls are a little more uptight than southern girls.

I also wanted to Thank you because I have been in relationships all my life as the “Regular-Successful Guy” and this is the first time for me to be out dating and picking up girls on the single scene. The book(s) are a great guide and insight to women and secrets to what women want. I have read portions of your book to several women and they agreed with 95% of what you said. So, THANK YOU! I have only had your book for 7 days and been reading some of your newsletters for about 21 days and already SUCCESS!! Thank you.


P.S. the book is worth every penny!!

***MY COMMENTS: First of all, thank you for the compliments. I really enjoy hearing success stories from guys who jump in, use the materials, and make them work. Hats off to you.

The reason I chose this question is it give me an opportunity to point out a useful distinction to keep in mind about teasing women.

As you know, I think that it’s a great idea to tease women. It shows them that you’re not afraid of them, and it levels the playing field very quickly. It also suggests that you have the kind of relationship that makes it OK to tease her. A great thing all the way around.

But like every idea or technique, there are a few exceptions and things to keep in mind…

Here are a couple of semi-common situations that you need to keep your eye out for, and what to do about them:

1) Watch for women who don’t have very sharp senses of humor. Every once in awhile, you’ll run across a woman who just doesn’t get it. Sarcasm just plain doesn’t make sense to some people (I know… how is this possible, right?… lol). Some women will take everything you say literally… it’s almost like they’re humor-impaired.

My favorite way to deal with the Humor Impaired is to wait for those moments when they say “that was rude” or they look at you with that confused look that people who don’t get funny comments get… you know the one where they’re trying to smile like they think it’s funny, but you know they just don’t get it?… and they say “It was a joke” or “I’m teasing you.”

I know, kind of lame, huh? But sometimes you just have to spell it out. Just keep teasing, and keep on saying “It was a joke” and “I was teasing.” This says, in effect “I’m having fun, and I’m going to keep on with it, even if I have to explain it to you every time.”

2) Pay attention, because if a woman is sending you semi-nude pictures online, etc. you might just want to skip the small talk and say “hey, I have an idea- why don’t we go back to my hotel room so I can show you my new stamp collection.”

If a woman is telegraphing “I’m ready, take me” then you probably just want to bypass the formalities and move on to more, shall we say, physical expressions of your teasing personality.

3) If a woman gets uptight when you first tease her, accuse her of being no fun, and a cold fish.

I’m serious about this one. Let’s say you make a funny joke about her, and she gives you that “I don’t like that you made fun of me” look. You now have about two different basic choices.

You can 1) Back down and do the “Oh, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to upset you” thing, or 2) You can say “What, you don’t have a sense of humor?” or “Are you trying to tell me that you can’t take a little joke?”

The reason I do this is because I want to find out as SOON AS POSSIBLE if I’m dealing with someone who is just plain no fun at all.

The fact is that there are a lot of women (and men too) who are just plain boring to be around. They’re too uptight, and they just don’t get it.

And yes, even some beautiful women fall into this category. You’d be better off calling it a night early on if you discover that the woman you’re in front of fits into this category… No amount of beauty can make up for a boring personality (Unless, of course, we’re talking about Christy Turlington. I probably wouldn’t care in that case).

So, in short… yes, it is possible to tease a girl too much. But if this happens, you’re probably either: 1) Crossing the line of INSULTING instead of teasing… or 2) Dealing with a woman who has no sense of humor, in which case you’re better off saying “thank you and good night” as soon as possible… and saving yourself from the most boring evening of your life.

Remember: The objective of teasing is to INCREASE THE ATTRACTION that she’s feeling for you.

…by the way… if you’re reading this right now, and you haven’t downloaded your copy of my online eBook “Double Your Dating“, then you need to do that now. You’ll learn several different ways of teasing women that will make them feel very attracted to you. As a matter of fact, when you visit my website, you’ll be able to read a great sample scenario from my personal experience that shows a different way of teasing… Just go to:

[ebook download link]

…and read about it.

I’ll talk to you soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. Make sure you send me your success stories and feedback about my book! Send to:

[newsletter sign-up link]

…and make sure you write “Success Story” in the subject line of the email. I read those first!

This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit

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