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Tonality covers a multitude of sins
1/4/02 5:52:24 PM Eastern Standard Time
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Joseph (from Exceed International):
Four essential types of men tend to attract women
1) The Daring Adventurer: He's the man who acts impulsively, throws caution
in reckless abandon in order to spontaneously embark on high-stimulation
endeavors. He lives for the moment and holds a vague inkling of the future.
The man's focus is solely for the present and on sheer short-term emotional
pleasure.
2) The Dark Vagabond: He's the man who oozes an almost anti-social
character. With leanings towards the unethical to the downright immoral,
this man is known for womanizing, substance abuse and most activities that
appear to go against social norm. Despite the negativity he attracts both
the sensible and "dumb" blonde kind of girl. Women fantasize about taming
such volatile creatures.
3) The Ideal Lover: Oh yeah, we recognize him for the poetry, the smooth
lines, the sensitivity, the utter empathy and almost selfless focus upon
the woman. He manifests a level of high morality, or at least a superficial
appearance of it. Women love this man because of the intense romancing they
experience from him.
4) The Clown: He may not physically look good, but his upbeat sense of
humor and lively optimism sparks enthusiasm in women which then lead to
infatuation , then attraction. This man, as I've observed in numerous
social gatherings, tends to enjoy the limelight. He cracks jokes, spins
incredible tales and makes everyone feel good. As a result, both genders in
general gravitate towards this individual.
The Man every woman hates:
1) The Vanilla-Boy Next Door: Predictable, routine and devoid of
imagination. He possesses adequate social skills but is neither aggressive,
funny, spontaneous, nor romantic. The lack of "emotional massage" he
creates on women shrouds him with a cloak of invisibility. Hence he is the
perennial loser.
My conclusion:
It then naturally appears that for any man (good looking or not) seeking
attention and subsequent infatuation from the opposite gender, ought to
play solely upon the EMOTIONS of women. His primary goal is to incite
within women, intense emotions (whether romantic, fearfulness, laughter or
adventure) because strong emotions naturally arouse a pleasurable and
exciting rapport. As we are well aware, women traditionally derive great
satisfaction from emotionally charged events and encounters. A relationship
devoid of emotions at the onset immediately create a negative first
impression which instantly cause the woman to box you in the Vanilla Boy
category.
The bottom line: It is the male's ultimate mandate to use any and all means
necessary to spike initial encounters with emotionally charged
conversations and activity (of whatever flavor) because the ensuing
excitement automatically creates the desired rapport that ultimately leads
to irresistible attraction.
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Ross:
> GameMaster (Comments from private email about online dating»): I know the
top 5% get deluged with mail and sometimes they don't have the time to
write back. I'm sticking primarily with the 34 and up crowd, I've found
that is pretty much the threshold to be able to appeal to their sense of
fair play when it comes to a reply. Lot's of very pretty girls on match.com
down here just because the bar scene is so brutal and the nitelife in this
city has sort of lost it's luster with most people. Still a pro-players town.
Ross: I like that distinction; 34 and up. It may also help to pick women
who have already been married once; divorced women aren't so much in a
hurry to run to the altar again and are less likely to demand "Mr. Right".
> GameMaster: I just make a list of the girls and copy their profile over
to Word and then edit it down and send it back to em'. Or it could just be
my devastating charm : )?
Ross: Do you have a form letter? I've been playing with a few and have one
that gets a HUGE response (especially since I hid my profile....now, they
can't check my profile and eliminate or pigeon hole me).
Clifford: You dangle the carrot, too. I am sure we ALL are curious now to
see your letter.
> GameMaster: Some tips on Match.com:
Now that I boil my experience of the last 6 months down, I've found the
3) I cut and paste their profile to Word and then write a witty one
paragraph response and mail them out once a week, or when the moon's in
Libra : ))) With persistence I've gotten my hit rate up to 70-80% with a
90% close rate after meeting. It's just not fair.
Ross: How do you handle the pic problem? I am STILL getting eliminated WAY
too often, based on my pic. I can't refuse to send one or I won't get a
meeting...at some point they want to see what I look like. I am thinking of
setting a challenge frame...seeing if I can get them to chat on the phone
for some light patterning/voice charm and THEN send it. What are your
experiences...remember, I do NOT have a profile up...that has worked to get
me more initial response to my emails.
Clifford: I think you need to visit a good photographer. I think that,
having seen you mesmerize some of the women who sat in your seminars that I
attended, that a good photographer should be able to capture that presence,
that dynamism that you project in front of the class and you should be
getting a great response to such a photo.
> GameMaster: 5) get them on the phone and talking as soon as possible and
make the most of it. The fucking email thing could go on forever with some
of these chicks. Oh yeah, and when they ask for more pictures I send them a
pic of my dog Elvis and tell them that's what I look like today. It's
really bizarre but they stop asking for more photos at that point and I
usually get something back like "you're even more handsome than I thought".
Ross: Yes, but at some point they DO see a pic of you and decide they want
to talk to you because your looks are ok, or they LIKE your looks.
So...what are you doing to deal with the pic problem and how would you
handle it if you just don't photograph fucking well?
> Clifford: You can give a woman orgasms just by talking to her and some
women shouldn't be called for 5 days after you meet her. And, now that I
think about it, telling some women they are beautiful is the wrong thing to
do. But none of these are absolutes -- they are all situation specific but
definitely not complete nonsense.
Ross: That is my point; rather than set rules for all people, why not learn
to observe the unique person in front of you and test to see what she
responds to? Surely, this is self-evidently the intelligent way to go.
> Mark B.:Whenever I wanted to bang her I said "hey, you look so hot and
sexy right now, I want to make love to you" and began kissing her and
undressing her and slept with her every time. I wanted her to do a strip
show for me so I simply asked her "I would like you to do a strip show for
me" and she did. When I met her, I said "I would like to take you out with
me." Then just focused on being fun and easy, kissed her on the 1st date,
told her she was hot and that I wanted her. How much easier could this be?
Why fuck around with techniques when all it takes is a simple direct
expression of what you want while being focused on her, fun and relaxed
with a smile. .... There is a guy in my office who has a beer belly the
size of a spare tire
yet he brought to our office Christmas party a HB9 with huge breasts. I
took him aside and asked him how he was able to get her and he said "I was
just honest. I told her I was attracted to her and that I wanted to be with
her." But, like I said before, if someone came out and said that in a
system it would not sell because in order to make sales "the higher the
degree of perceived complexity the greater the perceived value and higher
the sales".
Ross: Hey, if a woman is ALREADY ATTRACTED TO YOU, being direct about what you
want certainly will work. Here is the point that guys like Mark just are
NOT getting or aren't
willing to acknowledge:
If a woman is NOT attracted to you, clearly stating what YOU want from her
will NOT MAKE HER MORE ATTRACTED TO YOU. Mark keeps ignoring context. What
works, works in the context of what the woman ALREADY feels for you. Mark
has mentioned, time and again, that women approach him based SOLELY ON HIS
LOOKS. Well, duh. If a woman is drooling over your appearance, telling her
what you want is probably going to be well received, versus being "average
looking" and not having her want you much, if at all.
Context.
Context.
Context.
For those of you who don't understand that simple word, I'll explain.
Context INCLUDES, but isn't limited to:
1. The physical environment
2. What she is already feeling for/about you
3. Her perception of who she is, what she is used to doing, who and what she
is used to liking.
4. Interferences: emotional and external. Is she distraught because her Mom
just died of cancer? Is she being forced to work 80 hours this week to
finish a
crucial project? Did her girlfriend, who hates your GUTS, really go to work
on her to convince her not to see you?
As the SEALS teach: targets dictate weapons. Weapons dictate movement. The
more you know about your "target", INCLUDING THE CONTEXT, you and she are
operating in, the better you are going to do.
Now, if simply TELLING a woman how YOU feel and what YOU want worked to
get her hot and bothered for you, zillions of AFC chumps who have crushes on
women would suddenly be fucking their brains out with their dream girls,
just by "revealing their true feelings".
However, we KNOW from very painful experience, what happens when we tell a
girl how WE feel, when SHE feels little or NOTHING for us. When has this
EVER changed a girl's mind?
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AdamK.:
>Dean: The best and safest way to get a tan is to use the solariums/sunbeds.
When you expose yourself to the sun you are exposing yourself to both UV A
& B rays, one gives you the tan, the other gives you sunburn and puts you
at risk of skin cancer. The Solariums/Sunbeds only expose you to the UV B
rays and
thus eliminate the risk of skin cancer. Constant tanning though, even from
a sunbed, can age you faster. A good Aloe Vera moisturizer is recommended,
this also helps in
relieving sunburn. Also, a tan from a sunbed doesn't prevent you from
getting burnt, unlike a real tan and you still need to use sunscreen.
AdamK: This is just plain wrong. Tanning beds are even worse than getting a
tan from the real sun. Tanning salon owners like to argue that you can more
accurately "moderate" the amount of sun that you're getting, with the beds.
Kind of like moderating how much arsenic you drink. Truth is: You're
holding extreme rays only 2 inches from your skin. Ask any independent
dermatologist: The quickest way to skin cancer is to use a tanning bed.
I've seen young (19 year old) girls with big hunks of flesh that had to be
taken out of their face... scarred for life... because of their use of
tanning beds.
Here's a tip: I have a great, year-around tan. How? Sunless tanners have
made incredible progress in the last two years. Check out the web site:
www.sunless.com
The best is one called Au Courant. But I've used Banana Boat spray on my
legs and have had several women comment and ask how I was able to get such
a nice tan in the beginning of June. ($7 at Walgreens, and it's 100% safe).
Experiment with which brand works best for you. Application of a good
sunless tanner can take some practice, but when you get it right...
it's amazing! A good sunless tanner will leave you tanned like a natural
tan. Not orangey or yellow.
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NightLight9: Commenting on Crisonic's 'angry approach'
I have often thought something like this would work, but I don't have the
balls to try it. It demonstrates total alpha characteristics and great
congruency. I do have a slightly related 'approach' where when women are
walking by, I put my hand up (as you would to stop someone) and say
"stop!!! stop it!!!" This is pretty effective where women have a bitch
shield. You can do it deadpan leading to a smile or with a big smile. I
base this on the girl. Either way it needs to come off like a father
scolding a child. It really generates curiousity and rarely has a negative
response. Timing and delivery are very important so you'll have to
experiment a little.
I wonder how this would work if you just remained looking angry, instead of
smiling. Never tried it as it's not my personality.
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Mark B.:
Have a look at this quote I found on the net:
"In the particular form of psychotherapy I had, we learn about the three
levels of consciousness and the three groups of sub-organs of the
brain. Many men, will display their fascination for everything sexual, but
in reality a man wants a woman that he can have a stimulating conversation
with (Third Level, Cortex) a woman to laugh with, share tears and joy and be
partners when there is the need to grieve (Second Level, limbic system) and
a woman to have hot sex with (First level, brain stem). All people wish to
be approached in that order, Third, Second, then First. Many men think
about dating in the reverse order, and fail. They need to
appreciate the realities of our nervous systems and minds and treat women
in the right order in the quest to share deep love for a special person in
their entirety. -David from Venice, CA"
MB: So it seems conversation first, then having fun and being easy to evoke
feelings of feeling good about being with you then the physical side comes
next. Looking back at virtually all the women I have successfully dated and
slept with it always started out with an easy conversation followed by
having fun and laughter followed by the physical. But if I tried to sleep
with her before establishing a good level of communication and feelings of
ease and laughter it always backfired. On the other hand, it seems if you
have the two already, good conversation and are
having fun and laughing, and you do not go for the physical then she thinks
you are not interested and will say "let's just be friends" or "you are not
interested in me" like a few women have said to me when I failed to make
the move while the conditions were present.
It seems this is a natural order and trying to skip the steps or stall at
one of them before moving into the next one backfires.
I have put this into a nice little formula for myself:
Initiate contact, complement her and show genuine interest, have a good
conversation filled with lots of smiles, fun, laughter, and ease avoiding
talk of other women or relationships. (Not other women because the one you
are with needs to feel special like your mind is only on her and not
relationships because that will happen as a by product of you having fun
with her and also you do not want to come off as desperate). Then once
these are established show your physical interest in her to which she will
very likely respond. I keep in mind to make sure she knows I am attracted
to her as well as focused only on her with the goal of just having fun.
After all
women want to be cherished and adored. Superimposed on my past experience
this formula worked like a charm and now when I do it the results are
highly profitable.
>Clifford: You can give a woman orgasms just by talking to her and some
women shouldn't be called for 5 days after you meet her. And, now that I
think about it, telling some women they are beautiful is the wrong thing to
do. But none of these are absolutes -- they are all situation specific but
definitely not complete nonsense.
MB: Well, call me naive but I have yet to find myself or anyone else who
can give women an orgasm just by talking to them, not calling a woman for 5
days and then getting a positive response after 1st meeting from her or
telling her she is beautiful and have it backfire. So far it seems that
these things are supposed to be theoretically true yet in the real
world.........Besides why would I want a woman who cannot take an honest
complement, low self esteem????? NO thanks.
>Clifford: While I agree that being direct (aka being honest) is the best
approach, it doesn't always work the way you are describing and a lot of
women do not give in so easily without some real warming up.
MB: The key is progressing through the right stages as described above. But
I would say to her within 5 minutes of meeting "hey how about a strip show"
in a joking way if I feel she feel relaxed enough with me to take it. I
feel that placing a humorous spin on what you say allows you to get away
with saying almost anything.
> Cliff: The reality of "systems" is that everyone's skill levels are
different. I have seen guys pick up SS over the course of a weekend seminar
and have massive immediate success.
MB: Is that because they said so or because you saw them do it? And how do
you define success? Talking to a woman, getting a number, a date, a boning
session? Besides to a guy who has trouble talking to women just being able
to talk to them is massive success. Are you also suggesting that guys who
before could not get laid if they were the last mammal on earth suddenly
get laid like crazy within days or weeks just because they know how to recite
patterns or can control their states?
Clifford: I have seen guys approach women who previously gave me the
impression of being too shy to do so, who have succeeded in getting phone
numbers, closing that night, etc. Not everyone, clearly, gets these results
but some guys just seemed to have needed to be put on the right track and
they just fell right into place. And I am not suggesting that the most
socially inept of the group were the ones that became successful - as I
have tried to say, it varied based on the individuals. Some became highly
successful, some started getting success, others had no results, etc. But
there were several that I would have put in the "very limited social
skills" category who turned themselves around very quickly. And I saw these
with my own eyes.
> Dean: Commenting on getting a tan, coming from an Aussie and as you
should all know, Australia has the highest incidence rate of skin cancer in
the world, you can get a tan. You just don't get a tan from the sun, that's
all. A tan really does makes you look healthier and is more
attractive to women........When you expose yourself to the sun you are
exposing yourself to both UV A & B rays, one gives you the tan, the other
gives you sunburn and puts you at risk of skin cancer. The solariums/Sun
beds only expose you to the UV B rays and thus eliminate the risk of skin
cancer.
MB: I found this also to be the case. Since I started tanning in a bed
about once every 4 to 5 days for about 25 minutes at a time I found that
women approach me more often and are more receptive to my initial approach
and make more positive comments on my looks than before. This has nothing
to do with personality or confidence, just looks period, as they make
comments and approach me before any dose of personality or confidence from
me. Case in
point: I am sitting at the back of a strip club a few weeks ago watching a
hot feature stripper do her show. She throws out her regular dose of
posters then she picks up her last poster, motions to me at the back of the
club to come up closer to the stage so she I could catch her last pic. I
approach and she throws it to me. I go back to my seat. During her 4 songs,
she threw out maybe 10 of them. After that I was the only one she came up
to in order to autograph her pic. Then she says "I love to travel. You look
like you have been somewhere recently" You can check her out at
www.bikini69.com.
> Stephane: Mark, it never ceases to amaze me how comfortable you are in
talking so deeply about sex with your sister. She is lucky to have a bro
like you. Could you please explain to the rest of us insecure/immature dumb
asses HOW you are able to talk so freely about sex with your little sister?
I mean, you even recommended to her that she should get into the porn
business! What are your views on this?
MB: I am not sure how to take this question from you? What do you mean by
"insecure/immature dumb asses" and why do you find it amazing? Regarding
your question we just have been very open with each other as far back as I
can remember. (I am 28 and she is 23.) It just seems the way to be as our
whole family is very open about sex in discussion and in general as we
never attached any shame or guilt to anything to do with the human body or
human desires. I guess this is why it's so easy for me to tell women I want
them. I tell her about what I do with women and in turn she tells me what
she does with her men as if is no big deal actually, like a normal
conversation. But if I had to think about it I would say that I guess I am
open to her first and then on that basis she opens up to me. I tell her
"yeah, I ate out an HB
yesterday and she tasted like vanilla coffee" She would say "Mark, you sick
bastard but yeah, my BF was over last night and he fucked me 3 times and
blew in my mouth, ha ha ha" We make a joke out of it and both laugh. But
it's great because we offer each other advice on relationships and are both
much further ahead. I divulge all of my secrets to her and she let's me in
on what women think. Regarding the porn business, since she looks like
Jenteal in real life I made a joke out of it to call her a porn star and
suggest she gets into the business knowing she is too smart to actually do
it. She is doing a masters in sports therapy, she does not sleep around,
always uses condoms and always takes her time to get to know a guy before
she sleeps with him so being this open did obviously not hurt. However on
another point I am equally open regarding sex and all sorts of bodily
functions with all women I meet and they inevitably become equally open
with me. I find that when I open up first it frees them to also open up.
Just like when I tell them I want them it frees them to feel and express that
they want me.
Mark B. (Commenting to B.L.): Better to say "I want to make love to YOU"
rather than "I love to fuck." Saying you just want to fuck makes it seem
that you want to use her as a piece of meat. Many guys think they are
appealing to her by being "open" to sex when in fact they turn her off. I
have never had a woman slap me, run away or otherwise turn away when I told
her I wanted to make love to her. In fact, after indicating my sexual
interest in her, women tend to come close and develop a greater contact
with me. To me, this seems to be the ultimate
compliment to woman as long as the focus is on YOU MAKING LOVE TO HER, not
just making love or fucking in general. Subtle but important.
> B.L.: This is great stuff. I've actually tried this before, and while I
didn't get to fuck this girl, she totally seemed to get into me. She didn't
react badly at all. She basically just said, "Really? Why is that?" No
slap, no running away...It was a pure 100% positive result. She opened up
to me after that. I didn't even realize the value in it until now. What I
want to know is when do you usually use this? It seems to me to be too
strong for an opener, but maybe quite soon after starting conversation? Do
you use this at a certain point in your pick up? What about on younger,
more immature girls, have you had the same results with them?
MB: Also see my first comments above. When you ask out a woman and she
agrees to go out with you WHY THE FUCK IS SHE THERE??? To talk about the
weather, sports, pets, your dead uncles. NO, she is there because of
something that she stands to gain from you as a woman and you being a man
it is your obligation to give it to her. Once there is an obvious comfort
level between the two of us as indicated by laughter, a flow to
conversation, some
light touching, eye contact, etc. I decide that there is a connection there
and it's a good time to let her know I want her. But I make sure I let her
know I think she is attractive throughout our time together. Each and every
time when I told a woman I wanted to make love to her, women have endeared
themselves to me. Even though I do not get to sleep with all the women I say
this to, they suddenly initiated more conversations, begin calling more and
become generally much more receptive to anything to do with me.
Regarding pickups my opening line is "You know I could not help to notice
but I think you are a stunningly beautiful woman" then I engage her in
conversation, make her laugh, ask her out, more conversation on anything
fun, get her to laugh more and feel easy then once that is in place I tell
her I want her and 30%-50% of the time I get her with some persistence. BUT
if I hold back and wait when the conditions of comfort are present women
say LJBF or "you are not interested in me, Mark." Regarding age, I target
women 25 and up so younger than that I would not know about but I do not
see how it should be different other than maybe it requires more work to
get them to feel easy with you.
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Dwacon (Saajan Ke Ghar Jaana Hain www.dwacon.com):
> GameMaster (Comments from private email about online dating»): I know the
top 5% get deluged with mail and sometimes they don't have the time to
write back.
Dwacon: I also find many wimmin who write back, then you reply to them and
never hear another peep. I took some material from Ross and tweaked and
tweaked and it gets quite the response... but I suppose I need a good
uppercut to take them down after the right hook. Another thing I've noticed
is that when you sign on to a singles' service, you get a ton of emails
from some girl with a ridiculously perfect picture and she says stuff like
she doesn't care how ugly you are, she just wants you to... but first,
check out her web site and put in your credit card to see her pictures.
Yeah... and I can imagine tons of AFCs who fall for this.
> GameMaster: They have a feature where they show that you are "Logged in
Now" and the girls have told me that's a turnoff when they find that we are
cruising "for them while they're surfing for us. Doesn't make any sense but
these are women we're dealing with.
Dwacon: That's why I've adopted a "no mercy" approach when sarging a woman.
Their lack of logic is painful.
>Cliff: The reality of "systems" is that everyone's skill levels are
different. I have seen guys pick up SS over the course of a weekend seminar
and have massive immediate success, and others who have studied everything
and couldn't get their act together if their life depended on it.
Dwacon: I remember the day I got Ross' book in the mail about 4 or 5 years
ago. I called this chick off the personals line and was literally reading
paragraphs of the book to her... she was knocking on my door within the
hour and her panties came off before I could finish opening the bottle of
wine. Later, I met some wimmin who couldn't be sarged if I had a thousand
dollar bill taped to my forehead. It's kinda like Las Vegas... TO ME
anyway. But I like to turn the odds more in my favor. I do notice that
tonality covers a multitude of sins and I do worse in clubs with the loud
music pounding.
> Ciz: I think, similarly to guys who get into the exclusive relationship,
engagement, marriage sort of thing, there are also guys who get, "type
casted," into the adventurous, one night fling, multiple girlfriend, sort
of thing. Maybe girls can sense this. Sort of like the movie audiences that
only accept Arnold always in action movies. We need to somehow becomes guys
like Robert De Niro, who can play tough guys, eccentric guys, mentally
deranged guys, Mafioso, CIA agents, etc. Somehow, something we project
sends out the, "not for relationship!" vibe. I do not know what it is. This
may give certain advantages to getting the quick fuck, and maybe there is a
reason why certain guys unconsciously exude this.
Dwacon: I'm pretty convinced this is my case. I'm still working on how to
make this work to my advantage. I first became aware of it when, about six
years ago, a colleague accused me of harassing her at work. She was
interrogated and it pretty much came out that I had very little interaction
with her... never asked her out, never touched her, never said more than
two or three words for her. But her feeling was that when I looked at her
she felt as if she were naked. That made no sense to me at the time...
still doesn't... but it is a known constant that men act on what they see
and women act on the hidden meaning behind what they see... even if there
is no hidden meaning there. Back when I worked at that company, I responded
to this accusation by being extra nice and avoiding conflict. This was
tantamount to dousing a roaring fire with a bucket of gasoline. These days
(although I still walk on eggshells around the workplace) when a woman gets
this way I use NLP to turn it around... to take what she is projecting on
me and putting it where it truly belongs... between her thighs.Anyway...
exuding a certain je ne sais quoi (how's my French?) works to my advantage
when I let it.
> Ciz: I think one of the things of girls knowing that you have other
girlfriends or have a wild sexual history is that it attracts the younger,
sexually adventurous girls.
Dwacon: In my area, it is the 18-19 year olds that fall into that role. Any
older and they're already carrying more baggage than a squadron
of red caps can handle. Thought balls also work great on those girlz... go
figure.
> Mark B: My little sister called me today and admitted that she slept
with her new boyfriend for the first time. This is the same guy who she
told not to call her again because he talked too much about his other
women. He kept on being persistent and finally scored.
Dwacon: I met this little Janet Jackson lookalike via the personals and she
was like, "no, I won't kiss you." This kept on for a while. So I just
grabbed her and kissed her. She was like offended for a second, then got
hot and we wound up bouncing the mattress. Something about me just taking
it turned her on.
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cliff’s list advertisment section |
Cliff’s Comment: For those of you who are
just reading about this for the first time, I decided a couple of emails ago to add links
to these emails. The idea would be to get enough money in to hire someone to take
over the administrative work (and also to buy things which would improve this list, such
as proper mailing list software) for this list. If you were going to buy the product
anyway, just use the link that appears below and you are helping to keep this list going
at no extra cost to anyone. NON SEDUCTION-RELATED:
RECOMMENDED:
NOT REVIEWED YET:
|
cliff’s free plugs section |
Cliff’s Comment: The following are all
recommended but clicking on the links and buying from them doesn’t send any money back
here (it is also recommended that the sponsors of these sites consider setting this up —
from the little experience I have had since I started the commercial section a couple of
weeks ago, I think you are missing a lot of business by not doing this):
|
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