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“A Personal Success Secret” – June 14, 2002

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“A Personal Success Secret” – June 14, 2002

One of the concepts that I really think is valuable to get a handle on is called “Always have one default thing to do in every common situation.”

It’s amazing to me when I watch a guy interacting with a woman, and everything is going well… and then it’s time for him to either step up and make something happen, or walk away like the wussy he is for NOT taking action…


Ohhhhhhhh I hate it when that happens.

I’m sure you’ve never had this happen. Neither have I, of course.

I was out yesterday at the cel phone store getting a new phone (because a certain company who’s name starts with “S” has the worst customer service on the planet)… sorry, I digress… and I witnessed a painful episode of “Wuss Drops The Ball” right before my eyes.

A tall, blonde model-type girl was waiting to get herself a new antenna for her phone, and Mr. Smooth started a conversation with her by saying “What kind of phone do you have?”

The conversation was going along well, and they were both smiling and laughing about phones and such.

Finally, Ms. Model walked up to the counter and got her new antenna, then said “good bye” to Mr. Wuss-Of-All-Time, who proceeded to smile dorkily at her and wave as she walked out of his life forever.

He just watched her walk all the way to the other end of the store, out the door, and out of sight.

You’ve probably seen the “I’m SUCH a loser” look. Well, he had it.


He had that look in his eye of “Damn. I really should have just asked her for her number.”

Twenty bucks says that he thought about that girl all day long, and imagined 47 different great things that he SHOULD have said in the moment – but didn’t.

The only reason I’m so sure of this is because I used to do this exact thing myself all the time. And now I know that many, many guys go through scenarios like this every day – but never get any positive results because they’re not READY TO ACT IN THE MOMENT.

For some strange reason, many guys feel compelled to come up with some UNIQUE and ORIGINAL way to handle every situation. And you know what that usually leads to… (right, a date with Rosy Palmer and her 5 sisters).

So what’s the answer?


One way to start conversations with women.

One way to ask for emails and/or phone numbers.

One way to take things to a physical level.

One place to go out with a woman…

…etc., etc., etc….

I can hear it now:

“But David, it sounds kind of corny to ask every woman for her number the same way…”

I get it.

I used to feel the same way.

But here’s the deal: If you will just take the time to learn and prepare ONE simple way to handle each of the most common situations, you’ll be about a hundred times more successful than if you try to “figure out something unique and original on the spot” every time.

And here’s the irony of the situation…

Once you get a default way to handle each common situation, and you start experiencing SUCCESS on a regular basis with women, you’ll GAIN the ability to create better ideas on the spot.

Action Steps:

1) Choose the one situation that happens most often, the one that you’d like to have an EXACT default sequence of words and behaviors to use to get you to the next level.

2) Close your eyes, and mentally run through the last five or ten situations like this that you were in.

3) Brainstorm 10 or 20 great ways that you could handle this particular situation in the future.

4) Choose the one single best idea on the list, and refine it down to an exact sequence.

5) Close your eyes again and mentally rehearse it. See yourself doing it in your mind’s eye. Move around and play it out… if you need to stand up, do it. Actually imagine that a woman is in the room with you, and pretend that you’re getting her number, kissing her, or whatever.

6) If your mom comes into your room, quickly transition into “Macbeth” and claim that you were improvising on Shakespeare!

Seriously, it’s ULTRA important for you to know what you’re going to do next time you’re talking to a woman and you want to ask for her email of phone number.

If you don’t know what you’re going to do and exactly how to do it, then you’re probably going to come across like Mr. Smooth in the cel phone store…

Here’s the irony of this situation:


But if you don’t, then they won’t either.

A woman will think to herself… “He seems nice, funny, interesting. I wish he’d ask me for my number… Oh, he’s nervous… how cute. Well, if he can’t get up the nerve to ask me for my number, then I’m not going to overcome his inner WUSSY and do it for him. Poor thing.”

And I’m not kidding about this.

Find an attractive woman and read this newsletter to her. She’ll laugh her ass off at what I just wrote. Really.

Of course, if you would like to take a look at the “Teacher’s Edition” of the high-school algebra book and learn some of the secrets that it’s taken me literally YEARS to learn, then I’d recommend that you download a copy of my online eBook “Double Your Dating.” It’s full of literally DOZENS of the very best ideas for taking things from one step to the next. Just go to:

[ebook download link]

…now and download your copy. It’s the very best investment you can make in your dating success.

And I’ll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit

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