The Top Pickup Artist Forum On The Internet: Fast Seduction 101

David DeAngelo’s Double Your Dating Mailbag

“What Attraction REALLY Is” – September 6, 2002

<< full article list

Double Your Dating eBook
If you find David DeAngelo’s writing useful in your life, buy a copy of his eBook,Double Your Dating.  There is a Review of David’s eBook available on this web site, and you will also get access to David’s full product offerings when subscribing to his mailing list.

“What Attraction REALLY Is” – September 6, 2002

Our topic this week is ATTRACTION.

Before you read further, I’d like you to take a minute and think about what the word ATTRACTION means to you.

By the way, I’m talking about the romantic concept of ATTRACTION… not gravitational attraction, etc.

If you can, WRITE DOWN exactly what you think the word ATTRACTION means. The process of writing down your thoughts helps you to organize them (I recommend that you also keep a journal of your experiences as you improve in this area of your life). There are no right or wrong answers here, so think about it for a few.

OK, did you do that? Nice.

So what did you come up with?

A lot of guys seem to think that ATTRACTION is when one person wants what another person has.

Some think of ATTRACTION as the result of being good- looking or otherwise “attractive”. In fact, I think a LOT of people confuse ATTRACTION with “attractive”.

When I think of the concept of ATTRACTION, I think of it primarily as an EMOTION. It seems to me that it’s more a COMBINATION of powerful emotions that come together to form a very, very special new SUPER-emotion.

However you think about it, there is a process that happens that keeps men and women getting together to have sex…

You are reading this right now, which is a miracle.

Think of the thousands upon thousands of generations of ancestors that you have had… and think about the fact that NOT ONE OF THEM DIED A VIRGIN.

And not one of them died in childhood.

And then think about the fact that you beat out about five hundred MILLION other sperm-racers to get to the egg first.

You are the result of and represent probably the most amazing process I have ever heard of.

One of the parts of this process that fascinates me is how each pair of your ancestors decided to get together with THAT PARTICULAR PERSON at THAT PARTICULAR TIME.

I know that some people will be upset that I’m talking about this whole concept in such an analytical, detached way… women in particular seem to love fantasy of two people being “soul mates” and “knowing that your special someone is out there” and “it just happening”.

If you’re one of those people, stop reading now! lol…

After working on this area of my own personal life for a few years, and trying all kinds of techniques, it finally dawned on me that ATTRACTION WAS BASICALLY EVERYTHING.

If a woman feels ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else really matters.

Looks, age, nationality, wealth, religion, personal loss, peer pressure from friends and family… none of it matters!

On the other hand, if a women DOESN’T feel ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else matters in that case either!

You can’t “talk” a woman into feeling ATTRACTION, any more than you can “talk” a person who hasn’t eaten for three days out of feeling hungry.

I mean, if you really wanted to be fancy you could learn to be a hypnotist and talk them into it that way…

But I’ll tell you a little secret: Even that isn’t the best way to do things! (I actually know several people who use this method of hypnotizing women… and I haven’t met one yet who could use this technique alone to get women… there’s ALWAYS something else going on.)

What I’m trying to say is that one day it hit me like a ton of bricks that ATTRACTION IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING WITH WOMEN!

If you don’t know what it is or how to create it, you’ll wander around trying different techniques… and probably never land on something that works consistently.

And once I realized this, all kinds of things that didn’t make sense before INSTANTLY made sense to me.

All of a sudden I realized why women dated abusive jerks… ATTRACTION.

I realized why women dated men who were clearly using them and cheating on them… ATTRACTION.

And I also saw the FLIP SIDE!

I realized why women pass up guys who are honest, stable, attractive, and wonderful for losers… ATTRACTION.

Think of ATTRACTION like a drug (which it really is). If a woman is under the influence of it, then she’s gone. She’ll do anything to get more.

If she’s NOT under the influence, then YOU’RE gone. Nothing you do will matter if she doesn’t feel it.

If you doubt what I’m saying, ask the next 10 SUPER HOT women you see what they think of this. Read this newsletter to them, and watch their reactions. You’ll see.

OK, now that you’re heard a little bit more of my personal perspective, I’d like you to look back into your life and think about all those situations with women that made no sense at all…

Think about the women that you treated wonderfully that passed you up for the jerks… and think about all the women “friends” you had… the ones who told you about how mean and inconsiderate their boyfriends were… while you looked at them thinking “I would kill my own mother for just one date with you”.

Is it all making sense now?



It’s harsh to think about, but it’s true. (By the way, if you don’t do something to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION, then this is going to keep happening to you for the rest of your life, most likely.)

I have to point one more thing out. As I mentioned earlier, I think a lot of guys confuse the idea of being “attractive” with the emotion called ATTRACTION.

You can make a woman feel an INCREDIBLE ATTRACTION, even though you’re not what most people would think of as “attractive”. Of course, you have to know how…

The point is that if you’re not tall, handsome, and dashing, you can LEARN how to make women feel this wonderful emotion called ATTRACTION.

It’s a skill. It’s taken me YEARS to be able to even talk about this stuff in simple terms like this that make sense, and it’s taken me the same time to figure out how a regular guy like you or me can make women who we used to think of as “out of our league” feel ATTRACTION for us.

How, you ask, can we do that?

Well, you’ve read about the technique called “Cocky and Funny“… that’s a part of it.

But there are several other pieces of the puzzle, from voice tone and body language», to specific ways to touch a woman to get her physically turned on, and everything in between. It’s a system, and it all works together.

If you want to learn that system, then make sure you start with my online eBook and CD course, and stay tuned to these newsletters. Here they are:

My online eBook: [ebook download link]

My New CD Audio Series (this is the ultimate, of course): [products info link]

Enjoy, and I’ll talk to you again in a few days!

Your Friend,

David D.

This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit

The primary textual contents of this archive is Copyright©2001-2008 by David DeAngelo.  All Rights Reserved.  By your accessing this archive, you understand that the information contained in within is an expression of opinions, and they should be used for personal entertainment purposes only.  You are soley responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David DeAngelo harmless.  All names have been changed or deleted to protect the contributors, and questions/quotes have been edited for clarity.  By sending David a question or comment you are agreeing to allow him to use it in future articles, newsletters, and writings.  Please keep this in mind when you send your e-mails.

The content of this archive is reproduced here with permission from David DeAngelo.  Visual enhancements and search features have been added by the webmaster to facilitate the reading and researching of the content.  The raw text as it appears here is exactly as it appeared in the original context (e-mail newsletter or published material).  Products, services, or external web sites mentioned or linked to in this archive does not denote endorsement of those items.  The contents reprinted here are the opinion of the original writer(s) and are not necessarily the opinion of, nor endorsed by, the owner(s) or operator(s) of  The archive enhancements are generated automatically and there may be occasions where the visual cues don’t correlate exactly with the textual context; most of the time, though, the enhancements are pretty accurate.  The archive is updated as regularly as possible, whenever new content is available.

>> back to top

 Learn The Skills StoreStore
Learn Pickup By Watching