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“The Magic Combination Of Cocky&Funny” – October 1, 2002

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“The Magic Combination Of Cocky&Funny” – October 1, 2002

Over the past 3 days I’ve been teaching the Double Your Dating» LIVE! Seminar in New York… and it was an amazing experience.

There were guys who flew in from all over the world sharing and learning together.

And, of course, I always learn so much by teaching and interacting with a great group of guys. This program was no exception…

One of the things that we talked over and discussed a lot was the idea of why women feel ATTRACTION for some men while NOT feeling it for others (even though the men that a woman feels ATTRACTION for might not be good choices for her because they’re abusive, etc.).

If you recall, one of the concepts that I teach goes something like this:

ATTRACTION isn’t something that is logically chosen.

ATTRACTION is basically an EMOTIONAL RESPONSE to certain cues and behaviors.

One of the things I’ve isolated that seems to cause women to feel this magical ATTRACTION to men is the idea that I call being “Cocky & Funny“.

This is simply using an arrogant style of humor when you’re dealing with attractive women that leads to them feeling the emotion of ATTRACTION for you.

I realized as I was teaching this weekend that several of the guys in the program were having trouble getting the idea that a woman could feel an emotion like ATTRACTION in response to something as seemingly unrelated as making arrogant jokes (especially about her) and making her laugh.

I mean, how COULD this possibly work?

I thought I’d take this newsletter and talk a bit about why I think that something so illogical could help you to create ATTRACTION, and some specifics about how to do it.

First the “WHY”…

Remember, women feel ATTRACTION for a very different set of reasons than men do.

Where men focus more on LOOKS, women focus more on PERSONALITY, SELF ESTEEM, POWER, and several other more “intangible” qualities.

Women also love men who can make them laugh.

And by watching a lot of guys who are VERY good at attracting women, I’ve noticed a common pattern.

Most of these guys use a common way of communicating with women that communicates the above qualities WITHOUT ACTUALLY HAVING TO SAY THAT THEY HAVE THEM.

I call this way of communicating “Cocky & Funny“, and it’s one of the cornerstones of attracting women.

I believe that when a man is Cocky & Funny, he triggers a primal response inside of women that creates an instant emotional ATTRACTION.

This is because women come “pre-wired” with an internal template of what comprises a desirable mate, and a set of emotional trigger buttons that, when pushed, create that powerful emotional response called ATTRACTION that compels her to mate with the man who triggers it.

Most men have no idea that this mechanism exists or how to trigger it, so they do traditional “nice guy” things like buying dinners, gifts, and flowers… and giving women compliments… and calling them all the time (which usually have the OPPOSITE of the desired effect when used too much, and too early on).

As I got to know more and more guys who were REALLY GOOD with women, I started to see that they weren’t afraid to make fun of attractive women, bust on them, and even challenge them… but it was always done in a VERY FUNNY, even charming way.

At first I just assumed that it was the fact that this pattern was just a technique that my friends were using to make conversation.

Only after really paying attention, trying out this technique myself quite a bit, and LOOKING CLOSELY AT THE ACTUAL RESPONSES I WAS GETTING did I begin to realize the UNBELIVABLY POWERFUL EMOTIONAL RESPONSES that this one concept was generating.

And after working on it, testing it, refining it, and studying the finer points about women, men, and the whole “mating process” did I begin to really understand how well this worked.

The concept is pretty simple:

1. Take an arrogant comment.

2. Add humor to make it funny.

3. Feel free to use this combination when poking fun at the woman you’re dealing with.

Here’s a simple example:

Let’s say you’re walking down the street with a woman and she says “Wow, I really like those shoes in the window” and you answer “You would”.

Here’s another one:

Let’s say you’re talking to a woman who’s wearing a pair of shoes with four inch heels, and you say “So what, are you about four feet tall without the shoes?”

Get it?

You’re saying things that are FUNNY while at the same time A BIT ARROGANT.

An added bonus that these two examples demonstrate is that neither one is quite clear.

It’s obvious that you’re making fun of her, but it’s not exactly clear what you mean.

When you communicate like this, you communicate:

1. That you’re confident.

2. That you’re comfortable.

3. That you’re intelligent.

4. That you’re funny.

…which, of course, are all qualities that lead to a woman feeling ATTRACTION.

Of course, most men wouldn’t even THINK about saying things like this to a woman that they find attractive because they fear REJECTION.

Most men would also say that I must be CRAZY for thinking that these kinds of comments would trigger an EMOTIONAL response of ATTRACTION inside of a woman.

I can understand this, because when I first saw guys being Cocky & Funny with women, I PERSONALLY couldn’t believe that it was what was creating the ATTRACTION.

But the fact is that IT DOES CREATE ATTRACTION.

And as illogical as it seems, if you learn how to cultivate the skill of being Cocky & Funny, you’ll notice an AMAZING difference in the way that women respond to you.

You’ll find that the more you refine and perfect the technique, the more women will want to talk to you, be around you, and feel the uncontrollable urges associated with ATTRACTION.

So here’s the formula again: When you’re in a situation with a woman, say things that are both Cocky & Funny.

Let’s say you’re talking to a woman, and she says “Here, let me buy this round of drinks”.

You might respond by saying “Look, don’t think that just because you buy me a drink that I’m going to go home with you. I’m not that easy…”.

Or maybe she mentions that she just started working as a waitress… and you say “Well, that’s a deal breaker for me, because I need a woman who makes enough to support the both of us so I can pursue my life-long goal of being a house husband”.

Or maybe you’re talking about pop music and you say “Wow, I really love this new music they’re making these days… the sophisticated lyrical content of say, an NSYNC song, or the complex vocal arrangement of a Britney hit…”.

Are you with me?

These are all FUNNY and at the same time ARROGANT.

One of the exercises that I recommended this weekend was to take some time and come up with a whole bunch of Cocky & Funny comments that YOU can use in the most common “real world” situations you find yourself meeting women in… and then mentally rehearse them so you have them ready in your mind to use.

When you use this magical way of communicating with women, you’ll find that it often sparks an INSTANT sexual tension, and sets up a perfect interaction between you and the woman you’re talking to.

It creates a wonderful, entertaining CHALLENGE that women just LOVE to engage…

It not only sets you apart from other men, but as I mentioned, it also triggers that wonderful emotion called ATTRACTION at the same time.

Double Bonus!

Of course, this is one part of a much bigger picture of how to use your personality to create sexual tension and ATTRACTION from the VERY BEGINNING of your interactions with women.

And if you want to learn all of the secrets that have taken me literally YEARS to figure out, then I’d recommend that you check out my eBook and my new Advanced CD Audio Series.

These tools will teach you all of the powerful methods you can use to gain confidence, make women feel ATTRACTION for you, and take things to a “physical” level easily and with very little risk of rejection.

To learn more, just go to:

[products info link]

…to check out my CD Audio Course.

Or go to:

[ebook download link]

…if you haven’t yet read my eBook.

I’ll talk to you soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

INFORMATION ABOUT THIS QUESTION & ANSWER ARCHIVE:
This is an archive of a David’s answers to questions directed to his mailing list for his Double Your Dating eBook. David’s newsletter is a free e-mail list that that teaches men how to be more successful with women and dating. If you would like to purchase David’s book or subscribe to his mailing list, you should visit http://www.doubleyourdating.com/.

The primary textual contents of this archive is Copyright©2001-2008 by David DeAngelo.  All Rights Reserved.  By your accessing this archive, you understand that the information contained in within is an expression of opinions, and they should be used for personal entertainment purposes only.  You are soley responsible for any use of the ideas, concepts, and content and will hold David DeAngelo harmless.  All names have been changed or deleted to protect the contributors, and questions/quotes have been edited for clarity.  By sending David a question or comment you are agreeing to allow him to use it in future articles, newsletters, and writings.  Please keep this in mind when you send your e-mails.

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