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The Art of the Pickup : One Sssstep At A Time

"One Sssstep At A Time" / May 28th, 2007

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One Sssstep At A Time
by Jay Valens of The Art of the Pickup
May 28th, 2007

Salutations… There are stages in our existence we get out of step with our personal social stability and can’t see our way back sans the assistance of others. Consider this correspondence a step in the right course as I advance you step-by-step through the process. To start, no success can take place unless you are set to step up and stake certain action when you discern you must. That’s the first step. The next step is to ascertain any missing knowledge and start seeking the right steps towards seizing such skills. This will sometimes necessitate you to step outside of your present sequence and step inside a new one. You may not spot how your perceptions need to transform until you step back and witness a superior sight of things. The segments of understandings you stumble on are not your decisive answer but instead your stepping stones for realizing your goals. The sole wrong step in the process is taking zero steps forward. In the process, it will be necessary to ask some persons to step aside when they obstruct your progress and say to any person who attempts to step on you to step off. Conclusively when you close in on what you considered was the last step to realize your aspirations, you recognize it was simply the first step towards a new purpose, one which you never considered previously.

Now that I’ve got your attention with my homage to a “V for Vendetta-esque” diatribe…

The gist of the message is that, like any process you are unfamiliar with, you must learn how to get through it in order to be adept at it. The first step is realizing an accepting that.

Many people have access to a car and drive every day, but there was a point in their life that they’d never driven a car before and their only experience was watching OTHER people drive.

After many years of driving, and especially whenever driving a familiar route, most people experience a near-hypnotic automated ability to drive themselves from point A to point B without barely any memory of the actual drive.

If you think about it, that’s really amazing given how many complex things a human needs to do to accomplish this without causing a wreck. Watching the traffic around them, rear view mirror, left mirror, right mirror, adjusting the wheel for curves or to avoid other drivers or obstacles, accelerating, tapping the break, watching for road signs, road conditions, signaling when needed, paying attention to driving speed, and a hundred other possible things.

Part of getting to that point, they had to do a number of things:

- Become aware of WHAT had to be learned
- Learn what needed to be learned
- Put their learning into practice

From the standpoint of getting better at meeting and succeeding with women, you can look at our newsletters and DVDs as becoming aware of WHAT to learn. Really, looking around, that is pretty much already done for you.

What is not done for you is actually taking the time to learn that stuff and then putting that learning into practice. We are giving you access to the tools, it’s up to you to use them.

When you use those tools, it’s important to not try to get ahead of yourself and focus too much on your concern of ultimate outcome but, rather, learn one step at a time and focus on each successive step.

The only wrong way to go about this is to not take any steps at all (for example, just reading these newsletters but not taking any action). Figure out what the next step is and get to it.

Finally, there will sometimes be people who will get in your way, whether out of jealousy, spite, or misunderstanding. You can’t let those people dictate or hinder your process. If they are not actively helping you achieve your goals or, worse, hindering you, they’ll need to step aside and get out of your way.

Do appreciate the people who cheer on your success, even if they don’t outright help, because positivity from others is valuable and does help you a long. You shouldn’t depend on it but if it’s there then don’t take it for granted and show your appreciation.

Do not allow anything to discourage you, take it one step at a time, and eventually you will get to a place where you might even see it possible to achieve goals you had not previously thought possible.

Isn’t this all really pretty simple? Isn’t it amazing that it takes a newsletter like this to shine a light on a path which might otherwise have not been obvious to you?

I’m here to cheer you on AND provide you the tools, step by step.

Jay Valens

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