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"Highly Sexualizing Your Dress" / September 3rd, 2006

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Highly Sexualizing Your Dress
by Sebastian Drake of theApproach
September 3rd, 2006

Ring the Alarm - I had a question asked of me again. A couple of
my fantastic Dublin students and I were spending a bit of
off-program time after the bars closed getting a quick bite to eat.
I saw a cute girl, and we were kissing within 30 seconds - The
looks of mysticism and awe, I tell you, don't get old.

But you know what beats that for me? The look of an epiphany
happening as I explain something formerly mystical. Like a magician
revealing a magic trick, even the most elite, complicated processes
can be broken down until they are easy to comprehend, practice,
repeat, and succeed with.

How do you make out very quickly with girls? This a three-step
process. Today we ring the alarm and let you know step 1:

*Highly Sexualizing Your Dress

There are things that make you universally valuable to all women
(things like confidence, charisma, quick wit, empathy, leadership,
decisiveness, and so on). And then there are things that would turn
on some women, while turning others off -

These traits can be selected so you're very attractive to the type
of girls you like, while repelling women that aren't to your taste.
In this case, you can build your dress so that it's attractive to
women who are in the mood to get physical.

What's specifically valuable to these girls? Simply, very sexy guys
- So dress like a sexy guy.

A lot of times, a man thinks he doesn't have the natural looks to
dress sexy. To this, I'll point out something very obvious to even
the most passive observer -

You've seen overweight girls in nightclubs, no? Which overweight
girls get more attention? The ones with frilly shirts that
supposedly hide their protruding midsections?

Yeah, right. The chubby girls that dress like they're elite, with
sexy boots and tight skirts and tops get attention. Same with
"average looking" guys - dressing like a hot guy will get you more

And to men who say they like how they dress, ask yourself what your
clothes should do?

I want my clothes to support my goals. So for my professional life,
I get clothes that help me make my best professional impression.

For my social life, I get clothing that helps me socialize and
differentiate myself quickly - It doesn't even cost more money than
"safe" clothing like Levi's and Docker's.

To get highly sexualized, follow this criteria:

1. All clothes should be tight and well-fitting. For my North
American friends, this means very few of you should wear larger
than an American medium. I'm 5'10 and 175 lbs. and I'm currently
wearing an extra-small shirt that fits comfortably. For you gents
like Vincent (5'6) you should really never be going larger than a
small. I don't own a large anything any more.

2. Your clothes should either be in fashion, part of your image, or
ideally both. To get an idea of the current sense of fashion, spend
5-10 minutes in the magazine section at your local drugstore. Pick
up GQ, flip through all the pages and look at the advertisements
and pictures, spending about 10-20 seconds on each one. Don't study
them, just take them all in. Then flip through up to three more
fashion magazines. Also, feel free to check out GQ online:

3. Pick out articles are non-functional for work, professional
endeavors, and polite company. Liberally pick whites, baby blues,
and the occasional pink. Heeled boots, white cotton pants, and baby
blue t-shirts are all good examples.

Now, many men go too far when trying to sexualize, and make
themselves look unattainable to women (or just like dorks).

Here is what to do -

4. Work with what we call the "functional accessories" - These are
articles of clothing that serve functional purposes (as opposed to
rings, bracelets, etc.) and thus, you are allowed more leeway in
wearing attention-grabbing stuff in these slots. Items include:


You're missing out big-time if you're not wearing interesting
socks. For a bonus, grab a pair of argyle socks, which are
acceptable at work and cool in a club (at the very least, cooler
than generic black socks, and a huge upgrade over white tube socks).

If you can match your shoes, watch, and belt, that can look good -
especially if they're all an interesting color. White belt, white
shoes, and white watch (I like the plated Guess white watches
personally) is what is a good look. Another example would be a pair
of blue Pumas, a cloth blue belt with an interesting buckle, and a
blue Nike runner's watch.

5. The first piece of non-functional jewelry you want is something
to let girls talk to you. Specifically, if you're not wearing a
scarf, pick up a necklace or pendant that's got a story behind it -
It'll give women something to talk to you about. If you wear a
necklace out a few times and are socializing and approaching, and
no one asks about it, your necklace ain't cutting it - Try
something else. You can get cheap necklaces easy.

Another tip regarding necklaces - Try mixing and matching symbols
and chains. Little shell necklaces like surfers wear are passe. A
white cross isn't going to stand out in a hip-hop nightclub.

But a white cross on a surfer's shell necklace? Rock and roll.

So, get tight-fitting, fashionable clothes that you couldn't wear
to work even on "bizcas Friday". Pick up an interesting necklace.

Once you sexualize your attire, you'll be large on the radar for
girls looking for guys that night or that want to have a bit of
crazy fun. After that, you can use normal interest-based approaches
(genuine interest and nonverbal/playful, specifically). I'll check
in with you again soon, but let me give you a big piece of the
puzzle and answer how I made out with that particular girl:

When you open girls, feel free to take their hand, introduce
yourself, and give her a kiss on each cheek. Most times you'll
touch cheeks and make a "mwah!" noise. If you're sexualized, some
girls will put their lips actually on your cheek as opposed to
touching cheeks.

Lean back very slightly, look into her eyes, and say something
along the lines of, "Wow, your lips are so soft." Making out ensues.

Play nice, guys, and don't just play makeout-with-girls game. Dr.
Sebastian prescribes playing solid game and laying girls and
converting them to girlfriends, not just making out with them,
having sex in toilets, and going on your way. It gets old, fast...
well, not that fast... ;)

Ring the alarm. See you in London.


theApproach, World's Finest:

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