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A Lesson In Opening Sets

mASF post by Harmless

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A Lesson In Opening Sets
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mASF post by "Harmless"
posted on: mASF forum: Advanced Discussion, January 1, 2005

Let's talk about your expectations and goals when opening and also about what
you should be focusing on, thinking about, and doing to open effectively.

One thing I don't like is a default opening routine that leads towards a quick

DYD 3 minute email tech. is very limiting. What if you need more than 3 minutes
to get enough attraction for a solid close? What if you could insta-date her or
isolate and escalate or even pull her back to your place? Why limit yourself?

You should make it a goal to go out and take every set as far as possible. Not
only will your #closes be more solid, but your game will improve a lot faster
as well because you will be able to practice the transition phases of PU and
INTEGRATE everything into a consistant method and plan from start to finish.

On 1/16/05 10:47:33 AM, in post
etdad729 wrote:
>I found it awkard to go
>from one
>routine to another (eg who
>lies more to jealous
>girlfriend). But like good
>comics do, they weave a cool
>story and work on a cool

The transitions are the most important part of the sarge. Any opening MO that
only plans for the first 3 minutes or just for reaching hook point will prevent
you from spending any time working onthose transition points while in set. You
will not learn to INTEGRATE the "seperate" phases together.

Remember that the scripts I believe most of you use for openers don't actually
create any attraction, so you must rely on your delivery to do so. Tonality,
body positioning and language, eye contact, facial expressions, and so on are
crucial here for subcommunicating the right things to attract.

One big exception here is ijjjji, who from the very beginning is creating
social pressure and sexual tension. No opinion openers from ijjjji!

It's important to focus on how you are affecting the girl rather than on how
you are using the scripts. Make sure you are doing all those things that
actually build attraction: push/pull, playful misinterpretation, etc.

Remember that opinion openers and such are nothing more than a vehicle that you
can use to express yourself. So make sure you are expressing yourself in an
attractive way.

Let's talk about how to open without using opinion openers, and how to quickly
create sexual tension and the social pressure that allows you to dominate the

One thing that I do very quickly in my game is I start talking about the girl
herself. I make a lot of declatative statements about what she's doing,
wearing, thinking, feeling, etc, etc. The key is that I'm focusing on the
emotional/feeling rather than the logical.

What this does is it forces her to actually respond in a way that changes her
state. To progress in the sarge, you have to be first changing her state, and
then responding to that change. You have to be aware of what she is feeling and
more importantly of how what you are doing is affecting her. What she is
actually saying is less important.

You should be trying to make her feel some social pressure and to put her off
her guard. This puts the ball in your court and gives you control of the frame.
This is also the fastest way around bitch shields and programming walls.

Let's take the Jealous Girlfriend opener as an example. Everyone knows this one
by now.

Asking, "So if you found those pictures, what would you do?" engages her
logical mind. These words do nothing to generate attraction. She can respond
with a totally programmed response. She doesn't have to think about it. More
importantly, she doesn't have to feel anything. This does nothing to change her

Saying, "So let's say you were my girlfriend. [insert push/pull 'you're not
really my girlfriend' disqualifiers] I bet you would freak out. You... are the
type of girl... [insert cold reads]" engages her on an emotional level. The
words alone will begin to generate attraction, and combined with good tonality
and body language, it should be very effective.

You're forcing her to think. But more importantly, you are forcing her to feel
something. You're changing her state.

So let me give you my "default opening script". I don't really have a default
script because every girl is different. It's important to be able to quickly
calibrate and figure out what would work best in each situation. What I really
have is a default opening PLAN.

I'm going to go into depth here to help you understand the PROCESS, because the
process is more important than the script. I'm going to talk about what she's
thinking and what I'm thinking and WHY I say what I say and how I PLAN things
out so I know where I'm going next.

Let's assume we're talking about a mixed set standing up in a bar/club
environment where the music is quiet enough that I can be heard from about 3-5
feet away easily when I am projecting. This is an ideal environment. I'll use a
mixed set with a blond HB8.5 model girl from last weekend as an example
because the whole thing was pretty "default".

I grab HB by her upper arm and lead her out of her group, far enough away that
they can't easily pull her back in, but not so far that it bothers her.

I pause for a beat while she looks at me and sizes me up. This pause is very

Opener: "Hey, why are you looking at me like you know me?"

The reason this works is that by pulling her away from her group quickly and
being direct, I sub-communicate the right things to attract her quickly and
spike her buying temp. By pausing and then opening with something that
challenges her state, I'm forcing her to react. I'm also demonstrating an
alpha, relaxed, non-needy attitude.

HB here can say almost anything, but my next step is the same. Common responses
are, "I'm not looking at you." "I don't know you." "Do I know you?" "You're
cute." "I'm just flirting with you." etc.

What you should be aware of is not what she says but how she is affected by the
opener. What is going on in her head? She was just checking you out. You caught
her and called her out on it in a secret society way. Your question was
actually an accusation that slips under the radar because it was done
playfully. It puts her off guard. She can feel the social pressure: "I'm
attracted to this guy and he knows it. What do I do?"

No matter what she says, you have to respond to what she is feeling -- to her
state. That is how you push her buttons.

HB: "I don't know. Why are you asking me?"

This is common HB behavior: she tries to get control back by asking you
questions. You will see this a lot. Answering them just remove the pressure
she's feeling. Don't do it.

Harmless: "I saw you smiling at me."

(it is important that this is not said as an answer to her question but as
another playful accusation in your own thread)

"You have this twinkle in your eye. I know exactly what you're thinking. Oh,
and your nose wiggles when you talk."

This continues things the way I want them to go: Piling on more and more social
pressure and creating sexual tension. She can't access her usual social
programming because she doesn't have programming to deal with social pressure
like this.

The nose wiggling neg serves two purposes here. First, simply as a neg. Second
as a way to cut off the original thread of the opener and move on to something

If you can feel what's happening in this interaction, you can tell that she has
already begun to think of you as having higher value and of herself as lower
value. She is already attracted to you. Now you can start to qualify her in a
way that maintains your value. Simple compliments can work, but they run the
risk of validating her in a way that lowers your own value.

Luckily, we already have some ready-made qualifiers. Here is the time to use
them: "A-Crowd", "Can you cook?", etc.

So how do you *transition* into qualifying her?

Just calibrate to her reactions and you will know: The nose wiggling neg and
the pseudo-cold-reads are affecting her again. They're causing her to
subconsciously seek validation from you. She will probably kino you on the arm,
or maybe on the chest, as a way of establishing herself again. She'll probably
begin qualifying herself to you, like this girl did:

HB: "I'm not from Austin. I'm a model. I'm going back to New York next week for
a photo shoot."

Perfect. That's my lead-in to start qualifying her. She also took my glasses
and put them on.

Harmless: "You know what? You look like a not-famous version of Paris Hilton
with those on. You're like my own mini-Paris."

HB: Turns to her friends, "OMG, he just called me Paris Hilton!!!!" and freaks
out happily.

Harmless: "Yeah, but maybe not quite as slutty. You know what? You and me,
we're like the power couple of this whole bar. Look at us. We're like Brad and
Jennifer. Wait, didn't they break up? blah blah blah..." (power couple routine)

This is actually too much like fluff. She's listening, she's laughing, she's
interesting, but it's not really affecting her. I dropped it quickly.

I take her a bit further away from her group again and pull her very close to

Harmless: "I don't like you."

(notice the dissonance between what I'm saying and doing. This is important.)

HB: "What????? Are you gay?"

Harmless: "Do I look gay?"

HB: "I don't know!!! I don't want you to be gay!!! But if you were, we could be
best friends!"

Harmless: "You like me. That's so cute. And if I'm not gay?"

HB: "OMG, you have to take my number!"

The reason I'm stopping here is that we're out of the opener and well into the
attraction/rapport phase. In fact, it is already time to isolate/escalate and
extract. We're done with the opening phase and, most importantly, we know what
to do next. Total time elapsed? Maybe 5 minutes.

Let's have some comments and questions. ijjjji?

The Austin Society

Unless otherwise noted, this article is Copyright©2005 by "Harmless" with implicit permission provided to for reproduction. Any other use is prohibited without the explicit permission of the original author.


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