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Lay Report/Fuck Up Report: Double Vision

mASF post by jlaix

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Lay Report/Fuck Up Report: Double Vision
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mASF post by "jlaix"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, July 7, 2005

I’ll try to keep this quick and dirty. Like a dirty white boy. I’m listening to
a lot of Foreigner lately, so my reports shall henceforth contain large amounts
of Foreigner references.

Since I ditched the GF, my game has come back like a fucking locomotive. It’s
not just the freedom, either. It’s the fact that my INTENT is back. I feel
excited as fuck. I feel like the baddest motherfucker. I feel ALIVE.

When I go out now, it is with the frame of looking for a new primary. She must
be HOT, SMART AS FUCK, and SUCCESSFUL. With that in mind, there is no fear or
approach anxiety AT ALL. I just go up, and I’m screening them hardcore, right
off the bat. Like, when I do the whole “you’d make a nice new GF, can you cook?
Etc” bit, it’s not a routine, it’s REAL.

So that’s right, jlaix is in the market for a new primary. Desired qualities
include: tall, blond, big tits, fucks chicks. If you see one fitting this
description, please alert me immediately.

Another thing that’s been helping me lately is the fact that I’ve been getting
back into some really intense rapport shit. Or should I say In10se, because it
was his recent reports that made me decide this was an area where my game was

I’ve been doing so many RSD programs that I developed a tendency to just blast
chicks with attract material; because on workshop, you can’t get too deep in
set, you just do some demo for the students, you can’t sit there for two hours.
As a result, my rapport game atrophied.

So I boned up on some of the old masters of rapport, such as Toecutter,
Mystery, the lovable nerd Style, In10se, and even some old Ross Jeffries.

So I been busting this shit out every set now, as soon as I get a baseline of
attraction. It’s up in her face, “You’re very pretty. But you’re missing
something. You’re lonely. You need independence” and all this incredible
connection shit, like I’m soul gazing and about to cry lol. This has gotten me
fantastic results, I can’t believe I stopped doing this shit.

Funny though, the other night I was drunk (big surprise) and I started doing it
to this chick like two minutes into the sarge, it was way too early, and she’s
just sitting there with this weird look on her face. It was like, she thought
it was bizarre and out of left field, but at the same time it was having an
effect on her… you could see the conflicted look in her face… “this guy is
weird, but I don’t know… I can’t help but like it… what the fuck is he doing?”
Even miscalibrated, the stuff is super powerful, girls cannot help but be
affected by it.

So on to the report.

I called a chick on Sunday to set up a day 2, this tall tall skinny chick who
works at the club. I tell her to meet me at the Mint for some karaoke.

I go to my boy’s house to blaze some bomb and fuck with my ipod before I hit
this shit. But right before I’m about to leave, the chick calls and flakes. And
since I was stoned, I didn’t ignore and plow as I usually would. I just kinda
smiled and said, “Oh cool, yeaaaahh, tha’s cool.”

I realized I fucked up as soon as I hung up, but I said FUCK IT, and decided to
go to the bar alone. My buddy agreed to come along, but I wasn’t expecting
much; he is AFC and as such has a tendency to just disappear when I get into

We get to the karaoke bar, and there’s not really anyone in there. There is ONE
set, of two 7s and some guy. I open with Thug Lovin’, I am OWNING these fucks.
They think I’m drunk or high or something, which is rather astute of them,
because I am. I win them over. I start telling them how I’m looking for a
girlfriend. Then it comes my turn to sing.

I get up and I’m nervous, because my voice is sort of fucked from the weekend,
and I’m singing a brand new song… “Juke Box Hero” by Foreigner. Stars in my
eyes, just one guitar, slung waaaay down low, one way ticket, only one way to

Long story short, I DESTROY it. Not the most technically adept performance, but
it was GUT, which is more than enough to devastate the casual bachelorette-work
party karaoke-goer. They are hi fiving me left and right.

This other chick approaches us, she is ADORABLE. This petite little Latina
chick in a miniskirt, smoking. A low 9. A nine point oh. Start STACKING GAME,
routines mixed with vibe, then the HARDCORE QUALIFYING. Like, I’m going
overboard, I can sense I’m on the danger zone, but it doesn’t matter, she
qualifies herself to me on EVERYTHING… EVERYTHING. Like, I’m asking her, “Are
you successful? What are you doing with your life? I can’t have a scrub” and
this absurd shit. ‘You’re very pretty. People envy you because of the way you
look. But you have to try that much harder because of that. And be stronger as
a woman. I bet you think you have your choice of men, and you know you’re picky
or whatever, you play the role. But you say no more than yes, kind of like me.
Because you can only choose from the guys that approach YOU. And all you get
are these loser GUYS, these desperate GUYS. The guys you want are surrounded by
women, women want them. So you kind of have to inch your way in. And you end up
going home alone, and you think to yourself, “What the fuck am I doing? I’m
LONELY.” You’re lonely. You’re far more lonely than you deserve to be. I know
how it feels.” Hardcore kino, omg. Then I get called up to sing.

I sing “All Out of Love” by Air Supply. I actually cry during it, because I
think about Chessclub and the breakup. When I get off stage, the chick is
rubbing her legs like a cricket. I do a takeaway (a takeapiss).

When I get back, the guy from the previous set, who I’ve merged with this
chick, comes up to me. “Bro, you’re looking for a girlfriend? This chick wants
you, she told us. You can get her number!” I laugh… “Get her number? Cool,
thanks man!” More like get her ASS, yo!

I just pull her after that. We go straight to my house. She’s saying, “you’re
gonna make me do bad things.” Yes.

We shoot some hoops. We smoke some bomb. I put on some Aqua Teen Hunger Force
on the plasma, then lie her down. This is going so well. She is smoking hot,
and she seems so perfect, we are just vibing so naturally and having a great
time. It is ON.

Then I notice she has a raging cold sore on her mouth. FUCK. Well, this means
no kissing obviously. I just start on her neck. Then we get naked. I start
eating her out, because “I wanna lick it.” She loves it, she tells me I ‘eat
pussy like a chick”. I guess that’s a compliment. I know, I am the best. My
pussy licking is my only redeeming quality. After this, she blows me (with
condom, several seconds only, don't worry about me!). But it seems weird,
because there’s no kissing, that intimacy is missing. I can feel it, feel the

Suddenly, she stops everything, right as I’m about to nail her like a coffin.
She says, “Can we just be friends?” WHAT THE FUCK?!! This hits me like a bomb.
I wasn’t expecting that, again in retrospect I attribute it to the lack of

Now normally, I would just whip out the LMR tactics and proceed to defuse it in
a very methodical fashion. But, I’m so drunk that I just don’t give a fuck.
It’s like, dude, don’t do this to me, I gotta work tomorrow, and I’m too drunk
for this shit.

So I say, “Get out of here.” Just like that. INSTANTLY slam from deep rapport
and oral sex to coldhearted hustla.

She says, “What? Are you serious?”

I say, “Yeah, this is bullshit. Leave.”

She says, “Ok.” And gets her shit together. Before she leaves, I ask her to do
me a favor, to not smash my windshield or slash my tires. She says, “What the
fuck. I would never do that.” And she just leaves, I pass out.

In the morning, I go outside and look at my car. She kept her promise. The
window is fine, the tires are fine.

BUT… she kicked the SHIT out of the quarter panel. Touche!

If I see the chick, I’ll just laugh… she gets props for working within the
parameters I set. Of course, she’ll have to pay for it, but whatever. I just
can’t get mad at this kind of shit anymore, I just laugh. It’s a shit test.

Good times. Jeffy’s back. Look for a DELUGE of LRs from me in the near future
as I’m on fucking fire. I’m hot blooded, check it and see.


what's the difference between us? we can start at the penis; or we can scream
"i just don't give a fuck" and see who means it.

Unless otherwise noted, this article is Copyright©2005 by "jlaix" with implicit permission provided to for reproduction. Any other use is prohibited without the explicit permission of the original author.


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