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Re: Lay Report Someone =?windows-1252?Q?else=92s_Party?=

mASF post by slurride

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Re: Lay Report Someone =?windows-1252?Q?else=92s_Party?=
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mASF post by "slurride"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, August 8, 2005

ajhorst wrote:
> LR Someone else’s Party
> Yesterday was pretty crazy. It started out with me going over to one of my
> friend’s new apartment. We were thinking about having a small party by buying
> keg and calling over a few friends. I also had a few fresh #s in my phone, so
> figure I would also call them over. We made some calls, and made some plans
> how the guys would split up the cost of the keg (about 15 bucks a person).
> Everything was going nicely.
> His apartment is a college community, so it is crawling with hbs. I decide to
> grab a beer and go with my friend walking around inviting hbs to the party.
> first one I see is walking her dog right as I step out the door.
> Me: Nice beagle
> hbdog: Ya, she’s a little hyper today
> Me:Ya, my friend just go a beag…
> hbdog: (giggling)I think she likes you
> Me: Ya, most dogs usually do
> Me: (looking at the dog)I don’t want you to get any ideas, we’re only
> friends…I’m not that easy.
> hbdog: (laughing)
> Me: So my friend just moved in and we’re having a party, you should stop by.
> hbdog: Ya, I might…you know amog is having a party right above you, so that’s
> where I’ll be most of the night.
> Me: Allright, I’ll see you sometime tonight then.
> We then walk towards the pool, and there are about 15 gorgeous females
> barbequing. We could only see two guys. I almost had to rub my eyes like I
> seeing a mirage. Every single one of these girls was above a 7, and I have a
> very tough rating standard. So we walk up to this huge set and open them.
> Me: What’s up
> One of the hbs: Not mu…
> All of the sudden as I’m standing right by the grill a HUGE flame pops up. I
> don’t flinch, but turn my head towards the grill and back up.
> Another hb: OMG are you ok
> Me: Holy shit, do you guys do this to every male that walks up…no wonder
> there’s like 15 of you and only two guys.
> Them: (lauging)
> Hbleader: actually we’re the (forget the mame)ette’s
> Me: (sarcastically) WOW, I’ve never met a (forget the name) in person.
> Hbleader: you don’t know what we do, do you
> Me: Nope, never heard of you guys.
> Hbleader: We’re the spirit group of the UT baseball team.
> Me: Oh, like cheerleaders, I went out with one of the UT cheerleaders, you
> might know her.
> Anotherhb: No, we aren’t cheerleaders
> Me: So like a dance team…
> Hb: No
> Me: Ya, I get it now…I know what you guys are (pause about 3 seconds)
> Me: baseball groupies.
> They then all look pissed, and not in a good way. My friend whispers in my
> (I think you blew it). Just as I was about to acknowledge him, I hear my name
> in the distance. It was one of my exes who turned out to be very unstable. I
> hadn’t talked to her in about 3 months. Regardless, I wave her over to the
> group and introduce her. My friend then starts talking to the huge set while
> talk to my ex. I ended up inviting her to the party and told her to bring
> of her girlfriends. She left shortly after. I then began talking to the huge
> set again.
> Me: My beer is out, does anyone want one while I’m up.
> All the girls then look to hbleader.
> Hbleader: no thanks
> All the other hbs: no thanks
> Me: allright, cool. We’re having a party a little later in apt### you guys
> should stop by an represent the (_Y_)ette’s.
> Hbleader: ya, we might do that
> My friend and I then go back to his apartment to finalize the plans for the
> party. We then start talking about the party hbdog mentioned. We decide to go
> upstairs and check it out. When we got up there, I opened the door (no
> knocking…after all, it’s a party) and see a keg 2 guys and 4 INCREDIBLY hot
> women. All of them had that “unapproachable because I’m too good for you”
> Me: Whats up
> They continue the conversation they were having and act like they didn’t hear
> me. I walk up closer to them.
> Me: WHAT’s UP
> Alpha: nuthin dude
> Me: Cool, hbdog said you guys were having a party
> Alpha: Ya, everyone’s showing up around 9, (looks at my friend) You just
> in yesterday right.
> Friend: Ya.
> Alpha: Cool, You guys can stop by later for a beer if you want
> Me: We’re also having a party downstairs, but we might stop by later with
> friends.
> We then went back down to my friend’s apartment and start calling around
> to reserve a keg, and everyone is either out or their prices have been jacked
> up. They all said it is orientation at UT and all the frat houses were
> parties for the incoming students. We figured that the party is going to be
> small anyways, so we decided to just pick up a bunch of beer and whatever
> at the grocery store and stop by taco bell for some food.
> Shortly after we got back, someone knocks on the door so I answer it. It was
> two of the hbs from the barbeque.
> Me: Hey
> Hb: hey, we wanted to see if you guys wanted to come outside and eat with us
> Me: Well, I WOOOUULD, but I’m about to eat this Nacho Cheese gordita
> I then pull it out of the bag and lift it beside my face.
> Me: And after that, I’m going to move on to my ½ Pound Grilled Potato Burrito
> Supream…..UPGRADED to STEAK.
> I then lift the burrito out of the bag and give it a seductive look while
> licking my upper lip. It’s hard to describe exactly what I did in print. But
> the way I said it and how I did it had the girls laughing hysterically.
> Hb: (looking at the other hb) OMG he’s hilarious.
> Hb: Well, there’s nothing stopping you from eating your “½ Pound Grilled
> Burrito Supream…..UPGRADED to STEAK” (trying to say it like me) outside with
> us.
> Me: All right
> Me: (with my head in the fridge) Do you girls want a beer.
> Both hbs: Sure
> Me: I might as well bring a cooler out there
> We then go to the group and start eating. It was mostly fluff talk, and I
> really remember anything specific. Some of the other girls grabbed a beer,
> most of them didn’t drink. I turned to one of the hbs that knocked on my
> It was more of a private conversation as everyone was talking amongst
> themselves
> Me: So, I see that most of your fellow (whatever)ettes are on the wagon
> Hbknock:Ya, its soooo freaking annoying. Hbleader and them went on this
> and came back all changed. They used to be the biggest sluts around, and now
> they act all righteous like they are better.
> Me: Ah, I see. Just let them hang around “The AJ” a little longer and they
> be right back to normal….Instead of asking “What would Jesus Do?,” they’ll be
> asking “Who was it I just blew?”
> Hbknock: you’re EVIL (while she keno’s my arm and giving me “the look”)
> Me: You just need to convince Hbleader to come out to our party with her
> I’ll whip them right back into shape.
> Hbknock: Why are you so concerned about Hbleader
> Me: Because I can tell she’s the leader of the pack.
> Hbknock: Ya, actually she is the captain.
> Me: So go tell Darth Vader to get everyone to come to the party.
> Hbknock: (laughing) Ok.
> Hbknock then starts talking to the group and hbleader about how they should
> to our party. They then start discussing weather or not they should go, and
> finally decide to come along. I then start talking to my friend about how we
> don’t have near enough alcohol to supply all 15 girls plus the people we
> invited. Remembering about the guys upstairs who had a keg, we decided to
> have everyone go upstairs.
> We left a note on my friend’s door saying that the party was upstairs, and
> went to the party. It was about 8:45 so no one else was there yet except for
> now 4 guys and the 4 INCREDIBLY hot girls. I walk up to the guys and say that
> some friends were coming up, and he just replied, “whatever.” Shortly after,
> all 15 of the hbs came up, and you should have seen the look on the amogs
> faces. They were then trying to give me hi-fives and completely threw out
> alpha persona. It was like they were completely different guys. They just
> relinquished all their power to me and accepted me as their new leader.
> I, of course, then turn to the INCREDIBLY hbs that were there.
> Me: Whats up
> Hb9.5:Not much, so how did you get all those girls over
> Me: (lick her face) I’M RICK JAMES BITCH (Thanks PlayerQ20, I owe you one)
> Then (I guess now I should call them) bmogs and the other three hbs were
> falling on the floor laughing.
> Bmog: I can’t belive you just did that to Hb9.5
> Me: What, this
> Me: (lick her face) I’M RICK JAME BITCH (Again thanks PlayerQ20)
> This time everyone in the room saw this, and they were all laughing. I then
> tell Hb9.5 that I would talk to her later and started introducing the huge
> to everyone. We put music on and the party has now officially begun.
> more and more people start coming in, and it’s about half people my friend
> I know and half people the bmogs know. I just walked around the party getting
> to know people and introducing everyone.
> My ex eventually comes in with two of her friends. One of them was
> which somewhat surprised me. I just figured she’d bring ugs to make herself
> look better by comparison in front of me. As the party progressed, I was just
> walking around talking to different sets. Most of the time I would be talking
> to one group, and then hear my name across the room. When I would walk to the
> other group, they would have someone that “had to meet me,” and they were
> usually talking about the “Rick James” incident. Apparently Hb9.5 is known
> being an incredible bitch to people she doesn’t know. They would usually
> comment about how they “Couldn’t believe” I “got away with that.”
> Later on I started talking to my ex’s friend…
> Hbexfriend: So YOU’RE the AJ everyone is talking about
> Me: The one and only (turn my head and wave at someone saying my name)
> Hbexfriend: so what do you do when you aren’t licking people’s faces and
> 20 girls follow you to a party?
> Me: I’m a male stripper
> Hbexfriend: Oh really, why don’t you give me a lap dance
> Me: I don’t give out lap dances for free, you give me one and then I’ll think
> about it.
> Her: Sounds like fun
> We then walk over to the couch, and I say “excuse me; we need to borrow the
> couch for a moment… Hbexfriend is about to give me a lap dance” they move off
> the couch, and everyone catches word and gathers around us. I then say to
> Hbexfriend, “Ohhh, the pressures on, now you are in the spotlite…you better
> give a good performance” A new song plays that is appropriate for the lap
> dance, and Hbexfriend starts her routine. She was doing a damn good job, and
> every time she bent over I would slap her on the ass.
> About ¼ of the way through the song my ex barges through the crowd and grabs
> arm leading me out saying, “we need to talk.” I tell everyone that I will be
> right back, and as we are headed towards the door, my ex looks at Hbexfried
> shouts, “SKANK.” As we are walking out, she tries to hold my hand while I
> her. When we get outside, she asks me to go up to her bedroom. Of course, I
> denied her request. Then she starts crying and trying to hold me.
> Me: Allright, you need to stop
> Ex: You’re such a fucking asshole, you know, I LOVED YOU
> Me: I know, that’s why I broke up with you. I didn’t feel the same way.
> Ex: So do you just go around FUCKING every girl you see, like you did to ME.
> Me: You know what, THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT. There is no reason for me to
> here listing to you BITCH. Now, I thought you could be cool; and I thought
> could be a responsible adult and be able to handle attending ONE FUCKING
> with me there. I guess I was wrong. GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM (as I’m pointing in
> the general direction like a parent yelling at his 4 year old). I don’t want
> see you up here again tonight.
> She then ran away sobbing. I actually did get really pissed off (after all,
> interrupted my lap dance), and it took me a minute to calm down before I went
> back to the party. As I went back in, everyone was yelling my name. All the
> girls were especially going up to me asking about everything with my ex.
> LOVE drama. I just told them that she wanted to fuck, I turned her down, she
> started crying, and that I sent her to her room. I didn’t make anything sound
> over-dramatic. They also were talking about other things like the “Skank”
> comment.
> About 10 minutes later, the cops knocked on the door. One of the bmogs looked
> through the peephole and told everyone to quite down, “It’s the cops.” I then
> walked over to the door and started talking to them. I could write a whole
> alone on dealing with cops. The key is to remain one notch below them in
> status. If you act higher status, they will take you to jail…ALWAYS. If you
> like a pussy, they will write tickets. So, I answer the door.
> Me: So are we a little loud
> Cop: We got a noise complaint…and in a college place like this, we don’t get
> many of those. Y’all must have been real loud.
> Me: Ya, a few more people showed up than what we expected
> Cop: I see you boys are drinkin’…..a lot
> Cop: Is everyone here 21
> Me: Probably not, I didn’t check everyone’s IDs as they walked in or anything
> like that. (I show him my ID)
> Cop: I see you recently turned 21, you know that a contributing to minors
> ticket is a minimum of a $2,500 fine.
> Me: (acting surprised…believe me, I know every law in the book having
> to do with “minors”) REALLY?!? Even if I didn’t buy the keg myself?
> Cop:Yessiree (He then goes on to explain all the laws while I act interested)
> Me: Wow, I’m glad you told me that. This party should have ended a long time
> ago, I’ll tell everyone to go home, and make sure no one drives drunk.
> Cop: Now that’s a good idea, but if I get one more complaint, I’m writing
> everyone a ticket and taking you to jail.
> Me: Ok, thank you
> I then tell everyone that it’s my ass if we get another complaint, so
> needs to go home. As everyone was leaving, I literally had a LINE of hbs
> wanting to get my #. I’m not exaggerating. It was amazing. I was putting one
> hbs # into my phone while there were two more in a single file line. I got a
> total of 8 numbers. I remember when hbexfriend was giving me her # she said,
> “Ex will hate me for this, fuck that bitch…Call me.” That should be the
> future lay of all of them.
> As I’m walking down stares to go sleep at my friends place, hb9.5 grabs my
> and says, “Let’s go watch a movie at my place.” Now, every guy knows what
> mean when they say “let’s watch a movie.” It’s not even up for
> She then said, “I can’t believe you licked my face right when you met me.” I
> just replied, “Ya, don’t act like you didn’t love the attention.” That was
> last thing said between us that night. She just smiled as we walked up to her
> apartment. Right as we got inside, we started making out. About an hour
> I had to reach for the condom. I said a total of two sentences to this girl.
> woke up over at her place, told her bye, got her #, came back and wrote up
> lr.
> -AJ
> Ps: I have another post in general dealing with Alpha behavior and AMOGing
> I recommend you check out called “AMOGing and Fighting…”

Hey AJ,

I just did a search on your other posts, and I only came up with three
other posts, spread out for about a six month period. They were
extremely informative, and well written, and I hope that you continue to
post more often.

Unless otherwise noted, this article is Copyright©2005 by "slurride" with implicit permission provided to for reproduction. Any other use is prohibited without the explicit permission of the original author.


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