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Lay Report: But really, I‘m out of the game

mASF post by sheriff_p

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Lay Report: But really, I‘m out of the game
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mASF post by "sheriff_p"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, July 7, 2005

Some of you will remember I'm taking a break from the game at the moment
to concentrate on the rest of my life.

This seems to be manifesting itself as opening chicks with "Hi" when I'm out
with my buddies rather than going out and using opinion openers. And I've
had three blow-jobs and one lay this week. Some break :-/ I just can't seem
to stop myself opening.

Anyway, I never used to post LRs, because 90% of the time they were "Went to
pub with girl. Drank and chatted for two hours. Tongue down. Two hours
pass. Extract, lay". This one has some comedy value.

Few nights ago, I'd failed to get laid with this chick I'd met (number and kiss
closed, but she wasn't coming back to mine. That night. I should write up the
day2 LR soon. But it'll be a dull read), so I headed home, and decided to go in
to this bar on the way home. I was in a bad mood, so I thought I'd pop in for
a beer and to say hi to the staff who I know.

I get to the bar, and this cute little American chick says "Buy me a drink!"
in a pretty shitty mood, so one part of me thinks "You did not just open me"
while the other part thinks "Oh piss off". So I say "Oh piss off". She starts
shouting at me, calling me rude. But she's still there, so she's clearly up for
I'm at this point still too tired and pissy to be interested, although part of
brain says "if she offered to sit on it, I'd have a hard time saying no".
slim, tanned, big tits, and a pretty face. mmm

I fluff for three minutes or so, and think "I want to go home, let's close". I
to her "American girls are crap at kissing". She says: "You're just saying that
because you want to kiss me". I say: "No shit". So then she tells me she has a
fiance. I say: "You're just saying that because you want to make me jealous".
She giggles.

She's still there at this point, so I realise I can take her home, all I need
to do
is wait for her to ... and she says "So, are you going to buy me a drink?"

"Look, I live 300m away, and have red wine at my house. I'm not going to buy
you a drink because I'm broke, but I'll let you have some wine. Let's go".

"Will you walk me home tonight? Pinky swear?"

Pinky swear? The fuck?! I realise at this point I've solidly f-closed her, so I
'Sure', and we pinky swear I'll walk her home. She has to go and ask her
friends if she's allowed back with me - they seem to like me, but are a little
freaked out because I've just met them, so I give one of them my phone
number, and run a rapport routine on. Her friends are now pushing her to go
with me.

We leave, half-way home she says "We're not going to sleep together,
right?" I start laughing, and she says "What's so funny?", but really, I
don't want to have to explain so I just say "COME HERE" and grab her
hand, and pull her along. This works well, so I use it from getting her
from the kitchen (where the wine is) to my room.

I'm getting LMR to the point where she won't kiss me, so I say "Here's a
t-shirt to sleep in". This assumes she'll be staying over, and, the
t-shirt means no fiddling with weird girls tops when trying to escalate.
She says "Oh, I can't stay". I say "Shut up. I'm on my period anyway".
This seems to work.

We get into bed. She's a real cock-tease. We start having sex a few
times, but she keeps stopping. A fellow list member told me this
happened to him recently, and I was like "that actually happens?!". She
keeps telling me that she really likes guys who are assholes like me.
(I'm actually a really nice person, I was just in a bad mood) I'd kind
of realised this so I told her to shut up. I figured it was going to be
much easier to lay her in the morning, so I decided to sit on her chest
and get myself off. For the second time in a week, I had a girl who was
genuinely surprised that the end result of that was me having to give her

Next morning she gives it up properly. Which reminds me, I was thinking
"need to give her a compliment, so that
she'll give it up" - I came out with "uh, you have really nice teeth".
;-) Guess that shows what us limeys like about yankee chicks.

+Pete (who's being naughty and going on a day 2 rather than working)

Unless otherwise noted, this article is Copyright©2005 by "sheriff_p" with implicit permission provided to for reproduction. Any other use is prohibited without the explicit permission of the original author.


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