mASF post by "futureselfisme"
posted on: mASF forum: Field Reports Discussion, August 8, 2005After this weekend I feel like I should make my first post here at mASF. I've
lurked the site for almost a year, and it has taken that long as well to help
build my confidence.
In a period of just 3 years, I have gone from 210 to 180 pounds and from a
probable 3-4 in looks to about a 7 or 8. But looks have not of course been the
problem. As always, inner game» is the issue, which I have heard so many times
here but have always seem to resist on some unconscious level for reasons I can
never seem to nail down. Until now.
I have, as many would term it, a fear of rejection. But I'm not talking a
little fear of rejection, one that can be undone with fucking 1-2 girls
starting off. No gents, I have laid more than a dozen chicks, but I was STILL
an AFC. STILL finding talking to women to be a tension-filled experience. Shit,
I even had six one-night stands last semester, but I was still very inwardly
focused, too selfish, and unwilling to take anything but instant gratifications
from chicks. Despite a yearlong relationship and two 4-monthers, here I was,
AFC to the bone, hoping some chick would find it in her cooch/heart to fuck me.
Lame.
Until now.
This saturday was my worst sarging night ever. My game was so shot that I
actually WALKED away from a chick after asking her to dance and having her
accept. My wing, who is a true blue PUA and a longtime friend, of course keeps
rolling with me and helping me with new tactics, which will help develop my
game long term.
But after this past week, when I thought I began it with two girls waiting for
me to make the first move after getting their #s and then somehow expecting to
weave a good FB relationship out of both, I failed. Neither called, and I faced
the music. Once and for all. Last night, I chose to put my fear to an end and
truly go out on a limb. God willing, I became an rAFC last night. After reading
and understanding the plentiful info of Gunwitch and Maniac High and so many
anonymous posters Iin addition to my burgeoning experience), I have now
realized that it is my sovereign right to chase, cajole, charm, and
(consensually) fornicate vigorously with any woman I choose to pursue. End of
story.
So in short, I'm glad I spidered and lurked here at mASF, and I am now a real
member. I am excited for the future considering that now I have decided to make
a change. I'll try to break a leg for y'all (and break her off some, too).
thanks
j-bo
|
