mASF post by "SweetP"
posted on: mASF forum: General Discussion newsgroup, July 7, 2005Hey Chaco,
In the last two years, I’ve gotten many solid phone numbers from salsa clubs, a
ONS, and two girlfriends. I’ve spent over a thousand nights at salsa clubs
(I’ve been dancing for five years), and I’ve been to salsa clubs in many cities
including Toronto, Montreal, New York, Chicago, San Francisco and Barcelona.
So I definitely know about the situation you’re in, dealing with the whole
“one-song-dance” frame.
First of all, you have to understand that not all salsa clubs are the same when
it comes to the game. There are two types of salsa clubs: ones that are
frequented by latin youth who go to socialize and have a good time, and ones
that are frequented by people who consider salsa a serious hobby and are there
mainly to practice their dancing.
If you’re in the first type of club, then it’s basically club game as normal.
The only difference between that and a regular nightclub is that you can use
your salsa dancing skills to DHV or for social proof.
If you’re in the second type of club, then it’s a different type of
environment. You’re dealing with an extended social circle of people who take
their dancing very seriously. Generally, clubs promoted by salsa instructors
and salsa dance schools will fall into this category.
The problem with the “salsa hobbyist” environment is that it’s completely
commonplace for guys to do cold approaches by asking a girl to dance. Even the
most AFC guys do it. So you going up to a girl and asking her for a dance will
probably not even register on her “this-guy-might-be-a-potential-mate” radar.
Instead, you run the risk of getting slotted into the
“he’s-a-nice-guy-and-a-good-dance-partner” category. It’s kind of like the
salsa version of LJBF.
So if you want to approach a girl in this environment, then you have to
completely stay out of the “salsa dance partners” frame. In this type of club,
every loser guy will ask a girl to dance as an excuse to get into a
conversation. I would suggest you take the opposite route, and not even ask
her to dance. These types of clubs are filled with AFC guys who have learned
how to dance salsa but have no verbal game; if you have reasonable verbal game
by ASF standards then you will definitely stand out.
In this type of environment, think of salsa dancing as a rapport technique,
something you do in midgame to establish physical connection. So if you really
want to ask her to dance, do it AFTER you’ve got attraction, but only dance for
one song (preferably a merengue or a bachata rather than a salsa) and then
venue change off the dance floor to a quiet part of the club, preferably
somewhere seated. You have to make sure that the subcommunication of the
interaction says “potential mate”, and not “another salsa dance practice
friend.”
Now, everything that I’ve written above is accurate for beginner to
intermediate level salsa dancers, which is the majority of girls in the salsa
clubs and presumably the ones you are targeting. If you want to date girls who
are salsa instructors or professional dancers, then a whole different dynamic
applies. But that’s a topic for another post.
Anyways, good luck in the salsa clubs Chaco. I’ve always enjoyed your posts
and I wish you the best with your new hobby.
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